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Women Share Their Craziest “Ex-Girlfriend” Stories

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My Crazy Moment

Looking back, it probably wasn’t that crazy, but it violated the standards I hold for myself to prevent me from being a crazy wife..

Years ago, my husband’s friend came over with his new roommate. This was the first time either of us had ever met or spoken to her. New roommate was known as a skank, but I’m not one to judge. We all hang out and have a good time.

Later that evening after they leave, I open my laptop and find that my husband is still logged into Facebook. I see that my skanky roommate has sent him a friend request and put a message on his wall. Nbd.

So I am excited to log out of his account and into mine so I can accept my new friend and chat with her too. Except… She didn’t send me a friend request. She didn’t leave a cute message on my wall. Just his.

So I logged back into hubby’s account and blocked her.

Story credit: Reddit/ boxedtuna

Finding Out My Crush is Gay

Well it’s not really a “crazy girlfriend” because It was only a crush.

I worked at a supermarket on the registers, and this guy who worked at the store next door came in at the same time, same day every week. I ended up having a crush on him, despite never actually talking to him.

I went to the store he worked at one day, his shift was just ending and the next person was taking over for him. I asked his coworker what his name was and he told me.

I ended up going on Facebook and typing in his first name, his workplace, and where we lived and I found his profile. After looking through all his pictures and being a complete weirdo, I made a fake account to add him on. He’s accepted.

Long story short, that’s how I found out he was gay.

Story credit: Reddit/ areyuna

The Keg Incident

My college ex and I broke up amicably – just going in different directions.

The next guy she dated, she caught him drunkenly banging her sister, in her bed, at her house party. She *flipped*. She was only about 5’2, 110, but she somehow hulked a half-full keg out of a second-story bedroom window onto the roof of his car. Legal drama galore. She called me to bail her out. I did.

I never could decide if it was a bullet dodged or if I really couldn’t blame her. That was one hell of a provocation. 

Story credit: Reddit/ whistleridge

A Night of Revenge

My highschool boyfriend ditched me on the night of my prom (just didn’t come to pick me up, after I was all dressed up and ready to go) so he could go to his ex girlfriend’s house and hang out with her. My friends and their boyfriends all chipped in for my dinner so I could go out with them before the dance, but then I went home because I couldn’t handle going to prom alone, knowing I’d been ditched.

After prom was over, my friends showed back up at my house with several cartons of eggs. We drove to the ex girlfriend’s house, found my boyfriend’s prized Mustang, and egged the crap out of it. Oh, it was also a convertible and had the roof down, so the eggs got all in the upholstery and stuff too. My best friend’s boyfriend also apparently knifed the tires, though I didn’t find out about that until later.

Looking back, it was a childish, mean thing to do. But man it felt good that night.

Edit: Some more info for those who asked-this happened 15 years ago. Aside from needing to replace one tire, the car was fine. He was 20, I was 17. He tried to win me back a few days later (so obviously he wasn’t nearly as upset as I was) and I told him to go to hell. I definitely wouldn’t do anything like that as an adult, but as a teenager it seemed like a justified response to the situation. 

Story credit: Reddit/ myaN7

My Ex and the Magical Cream

My ex had a sore on his leg and I had some cream I wanted him to use that would heal it. But the cream was a weird color and he didn’t want to put it on. I insisted that he should because it would literally heal it overnight, but he continuously refused and got annoyed. I finally snapped and started literally screaming at him to put the freaking cream on and broke down in tears running to my room like a 3 year old. We broke up not long after for other unrelated issues… but yeah. Not my proudest moment. This was about 10 years ago and we broke up because we both had issues back then and have gone our very separate ways and are both married to separate humans.

I chucked a tantrum like a child because there were communication barriers and struggled to get him to do ANYTHING. He refused because I was irrational over most things due to the frustration of our toxic relationship.

The cream was some magical stuff that someone gave me that had some crazy name. Looked and smelt like tar but it worked like a charm. No, it wasn’t off.

Good times 🙂 

Story credit: Reddit/ lilymegeve

Revenge Poop

Found out my ex of 3 years had been cheating on me and had stolen money from my savings and my mother’s safe jewelry to make presents to this other girl for months… Went out with my friends the following night. We all got a bit drunk and for some reason had to poop at the same time.  We thought it was a good idea to poop on his car. So we walked to his house at 3 am and we all left a little poop on different parts of the car. I AM NOT PROUD. But I don’t regret it either. 

Story credit: Reddit/ Fl00Fl00

Revenge Fire

I burned his stuff and posted the picture of the fire on Facebook, then tagged him right in the center of the fire.

Story credit: Reddit/ VinegarPrincess

Long Distance Anxiety

This just happened on Saturday night. We’re long distance right now until May, and things are going super well, but I have awful anxiety.

One of his friends from the new country was having a birthday party, so he and all their friends went out bar hopping that night. He made sure to tell me that he’d be out late and might not be able to text, so I was expecting it. But 4 hours passed, then 8, and I got soooo worried. I trust him completely, so I didn’t think he was with a girl. But I was scared he’d been hurt in an accident, or gotten alcohol poisoning or something. 12 hours have now passed and I’m hysterical. I’ve been messaging him every hour or so (I really tried to hold in my crazy) “hey I hope you’re having a great night, I miss you.” The messages became increasingly panicked: “Hey please will you let me know when you get home? I’m getting worried haha.”

I mean, after just the 9 hour mark, I was mourning the loss of my best friend and partner. I was laying on my bed sobbing, willing him to message me, even just one word. I worried so much that my stomach hurt so bad I thought I’d throw up. And even though I trust him completely, of course depression and anxiety had to swoop in and say “I mean, since you’re not good enough anyway, why WOULDN’T he go home with a hot girl?” So I didn’t know whether to think he was dead or be angry at him for cheating. I cried for hours because there was nothing I could do about the situation, and I just had to wait.

Finally, 16 hours later, he messages me. He had turned his phone off to save the battery for the end of the night when he needed Google Maps, (and knowing the way he operates, the battery probably was at 60% when he left anyway. Then they all went out to eat, then got super drunk, walked around town, and he came home and immediately passed out.  I was so relieved to know he was okay, and we video chatted the next day, but I never told him how badly I worried because I felt so crazy.

Story credit: Reddit/ Langoustina

Boyfriend Breakup at Buffalo Wild Wings

My first boyfriend in high school, we were 15/16. He was about to break up with me because he was getting cozy with this hot new freshman girl who already had a reputation for giving great BJs, but I didn’t know that at the time. All I knew is that he was acting differently towards me, in the past he had been almost clingy but he was being really distant and acting like being around me was annoying. But on this day, I was still technically his girlfriend.

So bf and a bunch of other people started leaving together at the end of the school day, the high school was across the street from a bunch of restaurants and I heard from one of the other guys they were headed to Buffalo Wild Wings. They left without me, but didn’t say anything about it to me. So what do I do? Well naturally I walk over there and park myself outside the restaurant and wait. I waited for probably 90 minutes and this was before smartphones so I was bored af. Eventually the group exits the restaurant and bf sees me sitting on the curb. He wasn’t going to acknowledge me until one of the other guys said “Aren’t you going to say hi to your girlfriend?” So he gave me a quick one-arm hug and said “Ok bye.” Again one of the other guys prompted him to be polite and offer me a ride back to the school. He goes, “Yeah sure just hop in the back” (pickup truck.) Other guy says, “You aren’t going to let your girlfriend ride shotgun?” Bf goes, nah.

So yeah, that was really awkward and he called me two days later to break up with me :/

Story credit: Reddit/ Dusty_Old_Bones

Revenge of the Crazy Chick

My ex didn’t come home one too many times so I just snapped and ripped up all the photos of us and sprinkled the bits all over the bed and tore apart a little I love you teddy he gave me and left it on the bed to come home to. I felt like a crazy bitch the next day. And I’ve never actually admitted that to anyone

Edit: thank you for my first gold!! Didn’t think I’d get gold from being a crazy bitch. 

Story credit: Reddit/ Emmaline1986

Crazy Mid-Street Drama

Ran behind his moving car, howling, in the middle of traffic. We were in the middle of a massive fight in the car, and called off the engagement and ended up yelling and lots of tears. Asked him to drop me off right then and there, in the middle of the road, and opened the door of the moving car. He braked and let me out and I obviously slammed the door for dramatic effect only to realize seconds later that my handbag with my phone and wallet were in the car. Hence, ran behind his moving car, howling, in the middle of traffic. I just realized I am not as stable as I pretend to be. 

Story credit: Reddit/ sihayi

The Night Out with My Ex

I got broken up with.

Four months later I was out drinking nearby. Phone him up and basically TELL him, “I’m on my way.” He put up a small fight but in the end..begrudgingly agreed. So I stopped at home, (was not driving.) put on my new floral dress and wedges. Really. I looked nice.

I then have a friend drop me off there. Oh, and I also had a huge bottle of vodka in my purse. Despite being very inebriated already, I continued taking straight shots from it.

I wake up alone in his bed and walk downstairs. The amount of hate in his eyes startled me. He began to explain how I had tried to piss in his closet, & when confronted..I cried and declared. “You don’t know what it’s like to be a pretty woman.” I left very swiftly after being told that.

I don’t remember most of the night, & never got the full story as he had virtually blocked me in every way imaginable.

I’m sorry, Matt.

Story credit: Reddit/ Lp0ljq

Doubting My Boyfriend’s Story

Paid money to access my boyfriend’s court records because my mom had somehow convinced me he was lying about a certain court case that involved his ex. It turns out he was actually telling the truth. I was only skeptical because he has been known to embellish stories to make them more entertaining. This was while we were broken up for about two weeks, and I feel guilty about it all the time for even doubting him.

Edit: We were together for 2 years when we broke up, and shortly got back together as the breakup was due to stress from him. I’m still so ashamed of invading his privacy like that, but we are very happy and in a healthy place. I’ve never been overly jealous, so this was super out of character but a tint part of me is glad I did because now I know not to doubt him! 

Story credit: Reddit/ sidnutz

Bathroom Hard Drive Wipe

A friend of mine flew across the US, pretending to want to reconcile with her recent ex, in order to lock herself in the bathroom with his laptop and wipe the hard drive.

(In her defense, he was trying to send her parents and college professors her nudes and get her expelled and in trouble.)

Story credit: Reddit/ honeypeanutbutter

BF Surprises PMSing Me With Sub

I was hormonal and PMSing and so my BF brought me take out from my favorite sub shop. I cried when I opened it because it was my favorite sub, but I didn’t want my favorite – I wanted my second favorite sub. 

Story credit: Reddit/ quilles

Cheating Boyfriend Caught

Went through his phone and caught him cheating as a result. Not as crazy as some of the others on here, but it felt crazy to me because I am 100% NOT the type of person that does this.

The funny thing is, he started cheating when I moved away for college. I suspected nothing, but his DAD was a frigging bro and pulled me aside one weekend when I came to visit and told me he suspected he was cheating. Looked in the phone for proof and it turns out I had gone from girlfriend to the “other woman” to 3 different girls in the span of about 3 weeks. It was our 6 year anniversary when I found out and dumped him.

Story credit: Reddit/ assholewithbigtits

Teen Breakup Revenge

When I was 15 my boyfriend broke up with me so he could date another girl. I asked for a game back that I had loaned to him, and when I went to pick it up I dropped off a bunch of things that had been from our time together, including a little paper doily from Homecoming that had our names on it. I’d burned off half of it.

In my defense, I was 15 and that seemed perfectly normal at the time.

Story credit: Reddit/ eclectics

Cheating Husband Revenge

Found out my husband was cheating went to his girlfriend’s house with 2 trash bags of his shredded clothes, smashed cologne bottles in side, and a copy of our marriage certificate and dropped it at her doorstep with a note saying “he’s your problem now enjoy” with a “p.s. the return policy is expired you’re stuck with him.”

Story credit: Reddit/ SaCjAmWN

Sims Family

I made us on the sims and made us have a bunch of kids. 

Story credit: Reddit/ Literally_a_Gorilla

Internet-Stalking: A Cautionary Tale

Ohh man… So I can’t say this is precisely a “crazy girlfriend” thing because we were just best friends and lovers for years (2-3 at the time this story occurs) but I wanted to be.

I started by Internet-stalking him. His MySpace, Facebook (his pictures, his friends, his Notes), livejournal, deviantArt, he had a blog. I was convinced I was his dream girl and was determined to prove it. I was still casually dating though and had an OKCupid profile; he showed up on my list at a 95% match, my highest ever. I paid for A-List to be an invisible visitor and scoured his profile and its hundreds of answered questions. Read every book and watched every movie he mentioned (I actually ended up sincerely liking all of them, so silver lining). Casually started dropping them in conversation, among others so as not to tip him off. I befriended his partners and exes for inside information — another accidental sincerity as I’m still in contact with many of them, a decade later. I exclusively smoked his favorite brand of cigarettes and casually quoted his short stories, which I was fan-level familiar with. We got matching tattoos for my birthday one year and he had no idea I knew the tattoo he wanted a year before and started discussing my interests in a “totally unrelated” tattoo through that year. The matching tattoos were “his” idea by the time my birthday rolled around.

Short version: It worked, but we aren’t together. I do my damndest to never be that type of person but the urge is still there, my fiancé and I had to work through it and ensure I hadn’t done that to him. This was ten years ago, and I still get the creeps at the thought of a guy doing that to (for?) me.

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Crushing Our Anniversary Ring

I built a steel clamp (yes I went to the machine shop and spent time designing a solid model, cutting, lathing, boring, sanding the damn thing) just so I could crush our 3 year anniversary ring. You may wonder at some point, why didn’t you just use an already built clamp? Because I wanted to crush it in my own hands, and since i wasn’t strong enough to do that, I figured a clamp *made* by my hands, was good enough to feel like I was crushing it in my hands.

edit: Why did I do it? They were secretly texting (and who knows what else) with a former love interest for over a year. How did I find out? They told me after drunkenly and sadly making out with this former love interest because they “missed me” as I spent the holiday in another country.

Story credit: Reddit/ polancomodanco

A Gamer’s Game Night

…I kept his Xbox. I figured he would contact me since he left it at my house. I ended up playing halo and got super competitive with it.

Story credit: Reddit/ AccountcompromisedTY

Dude Wouldn’t Answer for 24+ Hours

Turned on the read receipts on his phone when he asked me to fix something else in his settings.

Edit for clarity/so I can stop getting yelled at in my inbox:

Dude would regularly not answer for 24+ hours.

Dude lives with his phone in hand.

Dude rode a motorcycle exclusively, and the only time I had been on it has ended in an accident. This led to a certain amount of anxiety, which I explained to him.

We had talked about it multiple times. His main defense was “well my ex used to freak out if I didn’t answer in 15 minutes, so sometimes I just don’t want to bother.” Understandable, but I was expecting something more like a response sometime within the next four hours.

Dude’s his own boss, in an industry that has a significant amount of downtime.

Story credit: Reddit/ AtlantisLuna

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Outburst

A few days after losing my virginity to some random dude I met online (consensually, to be clear) I called an ex that I had dated for THREE WEEKS and hysterically cried telling him I should have lost it to him. Poor guy had no freaking clue what was happening. I suppose that’s more of a crazy ex-girlfriend thing. 

Story credit: Reddit/ ardnassacaneres

Confronting My Fiancé’s Cheating Partner

Messaged the girl who slept with my fiancè (at the time – broke up a decade ago) in our bed on Facebook & let her know that I knew what they were up to & that I found the video she sent him of her riding her hairbrush handle. He saved the video to my laptop. Like an idiot. She was a cunt about it, by the way. I contemplated leaking the video to workers at the daycare she worked at, but didn’t want to deal with legal repercussions & I ultimately decided neither of them were worth the hassle.

I had met her a month prior when we were out with his friends. She shaked my hand & we ended up talking most of the evening, since the rest of the group were guys doing their own thing. She knew we were engaged.

It wasn’t a consensual open relationship & we broke up soon after that, for a plethora of reasons.

Story credit: Reddit/ 0veranalytica1

Spamming My Boyfriend

I message my boyfriend a lot. Like, SPAM a lot. Usually without any regards as to what time it is. Things that happened to me, whether I was bored, how many cats I saw today, asking him what he’s doing right now, things I saw that reminded me of him, just about anything that pops to my mind. Of course I don’t expect him to reply straight away, and if he leaves me on read I’ll understand he’s busy, but I know for a lot of people spam is annoying. He says that he doesn’t mind and that he appreciates that I think about him a lot, but nevertheless I’m trying to cut down the message load. Looks like it really depends on each person and the most popular comment I’ve seen is that it depends on whether it’s a good day for your partner (okay for walls of texts, yay for me!) or whether it’s a bad day (restrain from walls of texts, which is hard, but doable). At the end of the day I think it really comes down to communication; tell your crazy wall-texting partner if you prefer it, if you prefer it on good days only, or if you don’t prefer it at all. Whatever they prefer, give them the right to tell you “shut up”. 

Story credit: Reddit/ jivenchi

Heroic Reckoning at the Roommate’s Bed

Didn’t happen to me but a friend of mine & roommate at the time, cheated on his girlfriend. Well his girlfriend came over in the morning to surprise him (and unbeknownst to her, the random girl in his bed) while I was on my way to work. Next thing I know is she’s screaming DIRTY DIRTY DIRTY DIRTY over and over again.

I peaked in the room just in time to see her squeezing the last few drops of laundry detergent all over him and the girl in his bed.

He was my friend, but at that moment she was my hero.

Story credit: Reddit/ dozernaps

Pavlov’s Laundry Training

With my ex boyfriend I always insisted on helping him with his laundry. He thought I was being sweet; really I was training him pavlov-style. That way if he ever screwed things up with me (he did) he would have to think about what he lost every time he had to do his own laundry.

Story credit: Reddit/ DarkSoleBoots

Rumor of Crazy Breakup

When he broke up with me after two years, respectfully, in person, with a good reason (we were going off to college, etc.)… I cried a lot, hugged my friends, tried to maintain my diet, and cuddled with my cat.  Then I called him a week later to ask him to take me back.  He said something along the lines of “No, it’s the right decision for us,” and then I started crying, said okay, and we hung up.  I had closure; it was officially over for me then. A few months later, I’m having lunch with a friend, and he said, “I’m sorry, but this has been going around; I haven’t said anything cuz you and I are friends too, but Chris is saying you were a total psycho when you guys broke up.”  uh…. Ok.  For those who want to hear his side or think I’m denying any crazy stuff — cool, it was almost 20 years ago, I’ve always wished him well, I’m happily married for several years now — but that comment about the rumor mill from our mutual friend had me left with a “huh?!” feeling.

Story credit: Reddit/ ALittleFrittata

Missing the Dog

When my last boyfriend and I broke up I would come over at all hours, sit on his floor and cry while cuddling with his dog. It was super unhealthy and I feel really bad about how I reacted but damn I still miss that dog a lot. 

Story credit: Reddit/ goklissa

Ex-Girlfriend’s Bluff

After I broke up with her, she used makeup to feign bruising on her arms, neck, and face.  She then proceeded to send pictures of it to all of our mutual friends “warning them” about me.

Story credit: Reddit/ LXIX-

Sociopath With Alarming Request

I suspect she was crazy long before I knew her, but I realized she was a frigging sociopath when she asked me to euthanize my dog because “he was taking up too much of ‘our’ time.”

Story credit: Reddit/ lazlounderhill

Prostitution Affects Family

Put an ad in the paper. Became a prostitute. Brought clients to our family home. We had kids. 

Story credit: Reddit/ richardec

Girlfriend Threat over The Sims

Ever had a girlfriend threaten to cut her wrists because your The Sims character is dating the computer generated neighbor? I did.

Story credit: Reddit/ None

False Accusation Leads to Fiasco

She woke me up because I had the night sweats and she was convinced I had Aids.  For some reason I decided to appease her and got a full STD screen including an expensive Aids test.  A few weeks later I drove to her house to give her my signed note (I had to specifically request) stating my clean bill of health.  She accused me of forging the entire thing and in the following argument pulled the plates out of the cupboard and Frisbeed them at me. I left immediately.  About 6 months later (I had just started dating my now fiancé) she contacted me to tell me she believed me and wanted to know if she and her two dogs could move in with me.  I never responded.  

Story credit: Reddit/ Lurkist

She Noped Out!

Painted my name all over his bedroom, bathroom and lounge room.

Proposed and then Photoshopped us into wedding pictures, sent invites all his family, mine and my friends, got an ultrasound photo online and tried to announce to Facebook we were expecting a baby, shaved our initials into his cat and left hundreds of love letters taped to my car

So that was crazy… We went on half a double date with friends, I was just being a good sport, noped out when he proposed when my food came.

The rest came over the next week. To clarify as I feel I wasn’t clear: this was all after the one and ONLY date. This wasn’t a “we dated for months and then his crazy came out”‘” this was “we met an hour ago why are you proposing to me.”

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Sleeping Blood Draw

She tried to draw my blood out while I was asleep to put in a vial she wore around her neck.

Story credit: Reddit/ wrath212

Gone Drinking, Gone Dating, Gone Baby

Would start arguments out of thin air because “I’m drama, this is who I am.”

Then one day, I went drinking in her hometown, and she ran into her ex. A day later she said, sorry, but I’m going to start dating him again. 2 days after that, she was begging to get back together. Nope.  Messaged me occasionally for a few years to go out for a drink, but eventually stopped when she got knocked up.

Good luck to the guy who knocked her up, in addition to being an absolute gem of a personality, she had awful genetics and family.

Story credit: Reddit/ LaserBeamsCattleProd

Attempted Strangulation

He tried to strangle me with an HDMI cord because I didn’t straighten my hair that day.

He had been crazy for a while but that’s the very moment where I realized it.

Story credit: Reddit/ LaPompadour

Intruder in My Closet

Walked miles in the snow to my house, tapped on my bedroom window for an hour until I acknowledged him. I turned him away. In the morning I heard rustling in my closet upon waking up. The little a-hole snuck into my house somehow and was hiding in my closet. I threatened to call the cops so he left. Weeks later, he emailed me pictures of me sleeping from that night. I still have nightmares about finding him in a closet. 

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Noped Out

Was supposed to be medicated and never told me, didn’t matter since she stopped taking her meds before we dated. Tried to make up for it by taking many different recreational drugs that she failed to mention as well. Found her drug kit and noped out. Her mother said and I quote “I’m surprised you made it as long as you did!”

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Ex From High School Goes Too Far

My husband’s crazy ex (just a girlfriend from high school) was crazy because she set up an appointment for a portrait session to have pictures done of our 3 children for her house. No, we did not let that fruitcake take our children. They broke up their senior year of high school, and this is when we were in our 30s. Shocked at contact from her, nevermind the appt, we found out she also had her phone number listed (phone books then) as Mrs. Our Surname all those years, which was never her name. She was stuck in her high school fantasy, which was frightening.

Story credit: Reddit/ FenceGirl

Dodging a Toxic Ex

Beat the crap out of me, then out of his next gf and their kids. (He lied about his police record and previous conviction from beating me, he is charming and manipulative so I get why she believed him.) He got out of prison recently for what he did and I’m just glad I’m across the country.

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Guy Persists After Breakup

He started messaging all the new guys he thought I would maybe go out with asking them not to invite me out ’cause he felt he still had a chance with me. This happened not once or twice, this happened with around 10 guys. He didn’t even know them in person. I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW THEM.

Story credit: Reddit/ buenaonda1

The Ex-Girlfriend’s ‘Hey Arnold’ Shrine

She cut out my head from yearbooks and put them on cork boards on her headboard.

I found out because one of her friends told me she did, and so I wanted to see for myself. She was working during the day, and I was close with her brother, who let me in when I said I needed to grab something from her BR. I walked in and, sure enough, my head on a bunch of muscular bodies that weren’t mine.

I broke up with her the next day after seeing the Hey Arnold-esque shrine.

Following the breakup, she would drive on my street and stop and wait outside and see if my light was on. It wasn’t, mainly because I knew she would do that. Then she would call me and leave voicemails of her breathing rather heavily.

She then tried to get me jealous of her having another guy, which I was everything but jealous of, and she actually had sex with and got pregnant with said guy, which kind of backfired on her.

So….happy ending, I guess?

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Life-Changing Revelation: A War Refugee Story

I told her after three years of dating that I was actually a war refugee from Chechnya (she just knew I was from Russia, nothing more) and had seen a lot of horrible things during my childhood. I saw people being executed, bombs exploding, people dying slowly of gangrene, dodging snipers etc.

Never really told anybody this in my life since I came to America, I told her because I was pretty sure I wanted to spend my future with her. I told her it was a massive deal that I told her this in the first place, because I hadn’t ever told anyone.

She left me right afterwards because she assumed I was crazy or mentally damaged from all the stuff I went through. She said she didn’t wanna date some scary war refugee.

The worst part was that her parents, who I mostly communicated through because she refused to talk to me, believed it too. They said horrible things to me about it, saying I was a criminal, a junkie, that I would end up beating her up, I’m just another street Arab  (I am azeri, not arab). They basically put their foot down and said I could never date someone like their daughter.

One of the worst weeks of my life. Really made me lose faith in long term relationships with girls.

 For all those curious, it wasn’t an immediate thing. She always found me sketchy in a way because I was from the bad part of Brooklyn and she knew I had a history with hard drugs in my teens even after I came to America. She was scared of that stuff, she wouldn’t go to certain bars and clubs that had a certain ‘type’ of person, she preferred yuppie bars. She came from white, upper class suburbs so right there it was a major divide in how we grew up. Apparently that divide made her really uncomfortable, like she couldn’t relate to me, and finding out I am a war refugee just was the last straw for her. 

Story credit: Reddit/ willmaster123

She Was Nuts

She tried to drown herself in a river in the middle of December because she thought I wanted to sleep with someone else. I had to wade out and get her. This was after she spiked my phone on the ground when I received a text message from a friend saying my (then) girlfriend had left her purse at the bar.

On a separate occasion, she grabbed her car keys from me after drinking heavily and when I tried to stop her from driving she almost ran me over.

Yeah, she was nuts. 

Story credit: Reddit/ Renegade_Sloth

Her Pregnancy & Overdose

Was pregnant with another guy’s baby. I found out when she lost it during a heroin overdose. That was when I learned that she was pregnant and did heroin. Most upvoted comment. Still, screw you Amanda.

Story credit: Reddit/ 34Heartstach

Crazy Genetics

Genetics.

Both of her parents were crazy, so I shouldn’t have been surprised when she started stalking me after she cheated on me and I dumped her. She threatened a few of my (and by extension our) female friends with physical violence just for being around me and tried to get me fired from my job. She called my manager and told him that I was on drugs (nothing further from the truth) and had two of her other friends come into my store and be extremely “angry” customers saying I’d felt them up or some damn thing.

Fortunately my boss knew all about what was going on and didn’t buy any of it.

Story credit: Reddit/ stupidchange

My Crazy Ex

Oh I had one mega-crazy ex…This girl was 5 kinds of messed in the head and needed to be locked the heck up.

First, she had a kid… I didn’t doubt that, I saw her stretch marks. Not a big deal.  She claimed the kid had been kidnapped by the baby-daddy and disappeared.  OK – stranger things have happened.

Things started not adding up soon. She was a pathological liar – started with “I make $60/hr in the military” … which I knew was BS for her “rank,” since my mom was a higher rank than she was, and made far less than that.

She stole my car one night, and by the time the cops got there she was already back and claimed innocence, and the cops threatened to arrest me for making a false report.

Then she tried playing the ultimate psycho card, and said she’d had a call saying her kid/daddy had been in a wreck in Canada, and the kid was dead.  At first, I wasn’t sure whether to call BS on that or not. Two days later she downed a bottle of sleeping pills with a full bottle of Vodka.

While she was in the hospital, I did some digging and found out that she and her husband got a divorce and he was awarded custody due to her being a complete nutbag. I noped the heck out of there as fast as I could.  

Story credit: Reddit/ rushaz

Bizarre Tales of My Patient

When he got himself locked in four point restraints in the ER because he was convinced he had AIDS and started trying to “infect” the staff, or when he proudly told me he was the son of Jesus Christ, or when he tried to kick in my door at 3:00 am as a grand romantic gesture.

Or how he thought his bald spot would grow hair again if he was just a better person. 

Story credit: Reddit/ ohhannabanana

Finding Out My Boyfriend’s Secret Life

I noticed my underwear was going missing.  I mentioned it while doing the laundry. He accused me of cheating, saying I must have left my things at some dude’s house I was cheating with and began beating me for the missing items.  I was pregnant with his child at the time. I kicked him out, scared how I was going to support myself while I was about to give birth and miss work for 6 weeks. I began packing his things to keep my frightened mind busy. Find a big box hidden in the basement full of my missing things, huge inflatable butt plugs, and transexual entertainment. My thigh-highs were tied in knots with ball hairs sticking out of them, I put in a video tape labeled with my name. It’s him dressed as me with my clothing on, beating off and banging him to the idea of being me. His nuts tied up with my stockings…

Turns out he was a secret cross dresser/trans with a violent history and multiple drug charges.  Lied about everything, from his education to his orientation… I don’t trust human beings anymore….

Story credit: Reddit/ BabeOfBlasphemy

Crazy Exes

I wanna say we were both each other’s crazy exes.

He cheated on me, begged me not to break up with him, then repetitively threatened and even attempted once to kill himself after I broke up with him.

And then of course me, being really upset about being cheated on, I returned his shirts and hoodies he had given to me. In shreds. 

Story credit: Reddit/ None

Ex-Gone Wrong

First he was just my ex. Then he threatened to post some risque pics of me online and/or kill himself.  As if that would make me want him back…

Story credit: Reddit/ OutdoorFreshScent

Baby Drama

When we broke up he moved into my neighbor’s apartment and would hang around outside waiting for me to take the trash out or leave for work. They had a surveillance camera on their front door (drug dealers) So every time I came home, he’d be moping around outside trying to get me to come outside.

I ended up moving out of state, on a trip back home we had been on better terms and were planning on meeting up for a drink. Before that happened, I found out he got this girl pregnant and she was terminating the pregnancy – whatever, totally her/their choice. Not my business but I called off the drinks and told him I knew what was going on and I had no interest in being involved in that drama.

He tried to say he didn’t even know if it was his, he told the girl he got pregnant he was going to off himself, blah blah blah. Before I left town I had a card in my dad’s driveway from my ex, inside he wrote all kinds of crazy stuff. I don’t remember what it said but I do remember the poorly sketched picture he drew of a terminated baby with its umbilical cord wrapped around its neck like a noose. 

Story credit: Reddit/ Cookies89

Choosing Between Family and Girlfriend

The crazy chick literally made me choose between her and my mother and sister. She couldn’t handle other women in my life. It went beyond just not liking me being around them. She would go to crazy far lengths to get me away from any female in the vicinity. She never did that until a month or two before we broke up. Glad I did that.

Story credit: Reddit/ UncertainFool

All image sources: Pexels

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