Stranger Danger
As her date excused himself to use the bathroom, Hadia felt like it was going great. This could be the one! Their conversation was flowing and she was keeping her fingers crossed he would ask for a second date!
All of a sudden, a stranger slipped her a note that changed everything. As she opened the piece of paper her stomach dropped and her heart stopped. Hadia read the words and suddenly everything felt cold. She didn’t think it could be true but how could she ignore this message? Now, she had to act quickly...
A Virginia Connection
One woman from Virginia was excited to take a leap on love! She had agreed to meet a gentleman for a first date and everything on paper looked promising. It’s important to choose an environment that you feel comfortable and safe in.
It’s becoming more common for people to schedule daytime dates. It gives the perfect excuse to leave and doesn’t ruin your evening. Hadia had chosen a cute coffee shop to meet her date, but a stranger stopped her from making a grave mistake.
The Perfect Line
The biggest struggle with connecting on dating apps is how to say hello. You have to be genuine, and not boring and potentially funny all very quickly! Hadia and her date had matched and the conversation had been good.
As the day of the date came closer, she read over their texts. Had she missed anything? She hoped in real life he would be as funny and easy to talk to. She went to bed the night before the date hopeful for a connection. It would be the opposite of what she got.
The Perfect Outfit
Hadia woke up super excited. She had been chatting with this person for a couple of days. It was awesome they wanted to meet instead of just text back and forth constantly. Another annoying thing with dating apps is you can sometimes end up with a “pen-pal”.
A “pen-pal” never has any intention of meeting up or going on a first date. You will spend days texting back and forth but every time you try to schedule plans, they are busy. Hadia was relieved they were already meeting in person, but would she regret it a couple of hours later?
The Twitter-Verse
Twitter is a popular social media site where users can only share their thoughts with 280 characters. People love how creative everyone is, and how much so little can say. You can develop a large audience and share important facts or funny moments of your day.
Hadia was an active Twitter user and enjoyed sharing her dating dilemmas with her followers! As she left her house to go to the coffee shop, she hoped today would be a tweet #romanceisalive! After today’s date, her followers got more than they bargained for!
Caffeine Connections
Hadia thought her date was attractive and he had a lot to say. Their conversation was flowing and one cup of coffee turned into two. When he excused himself to go to the bathroom, she reached for her phone to update her friends and followers.
At that moment a concerned stranger took a chance. They had been listening to the date in the coffee shop and couldn’t sit by any longer. As they dropped the note onto Hadia’s table, she was shocked and gasped at the words on the paper!
What Makes A Good Date
There are so many factors that decide how a date is going. Two people need to have a connection, chemistry, and shared interests. It’s important that you have similar views and are a nice view for your date!
On a first date, you should avoid controversial topics or anything that could offend your date. It’s your first impression and you want to do your best to impress. Hadia’s date had a lot of opinions, but was that controversial? Did this stranger risk embarrassing themselves instead of saving Hadia?
Small Spaces For Big Personality’s
Meeting at a coffee shop for a date is great for a number of reasons. If you choose a smaller independent shop you’re supporting local business owners and there are always people around. You don’t want to be in the middle of nowhere the first time you meet a stranger.
On the day of the date, the coffee shop was busy. Hadia and her date sat down to chat and enjoy their cappuccinos. Hadia locked eyes with the stranger sitting across from her and she realized this probably wouldn’t work. A stranger nearby decided to take matters into their own hands.
Would You Notice These Signs?
It’s always interesting seeing other people on first dates. From an outsider’s viewpoint, you might notice body language or different tells the people on the date miss.
Both people on the date might be trying so hard to impress each other that they’re missing out on what their body is naturally saying. Body language experts look at multiple things to make an opinion but this stranger wasn’t an expert. On pure intuition, they just knew something was terribly wrong.
Body Talks
Body language experts will look at a few main things. They will look at the direction of your feet and which way your body is turned. They will also look at how much space you keep between the other person, and if you touch your face.
During a date, it would be expected to sit close together. Your feet would point towards the person you are attracted to and your whole body will be turned towards them as you engage. This mysterious stranger noticed how uncomfortable Hadia looked and didn’t want her to waste any more time.
She Thought About Leaving
Hadia thought her date was interesting. He had very strong opinions that didn’t necessarily match with her views. Hadia believed that a great discussion can have opposing views, and she was being respectful while listening.
She didn’t think her date was being as respectful and she began to wonder if she should make an exit strategy. As he excused himself to go to the bathroom, Hadia decided to pick up her phone and make different plans. Instead, a mysterious stranger gave her instant viral fame.
At Least No One Knew Her
It can be the worse timing to run into someone while you are on a first date, but thankfully that wasn’t the case today. Even though the coffee shop was close to Hadia’s apartment, no one knew her or her date.
The anonymity was making her date brave and speaking out on topics he thought no one was listening to. Hadia was trying to be respectful but she began to cringe every time he was expressing a new opinion. She began to wish anyone she knew would walk in the door, but her rescuer was there the entire time.
Remember You Are Never Alone
In society, we always stay aware of who is around us. It’s natural to eavesdrop and listen to small parts of conversations. This one cafe patron had overheard enough and didn’t want Hadia to be polite anymore.
The stranger made a quick plan when he saw the date get up for the bathroom. He didn’t want to embarrass her because dating was already hard enough. He decided to write a quick note and dropped it off with a reassuring smile. Would Hadia read this and get out while she still could?
Be Safe Girl
The note was written on a local pharmacy receipt. It was in a bright blue ink, and the message was loud and clear. As Hadia read the message, she was shocked and looked up for the stranger, but he was already gone.
Her date wouldn’t be in the bathroom forever. What should she do now? A kind stranger had given her more than enough reason to run out the door, but she didn’t want to be rude. Time was ticking and Hadia needed to make a decision.
The Initial Reaction
At first, when Hadia read the note she was really touched someone was thinking about her safety and well-being. It’s not every day a random stranger will take your comfort into consideration and she really wanted to thank this man for his brave gesture.
She decided instead of leaving the date to share this message with her Twitter followers. She already updated them with her dating stories and she knew they would love this new one! Quickly, before she could change her mind she snapped a picture and posted it, but what if her date was on her Twitter at this very moment?
What Were The Flags?
When someone tells you there are red flags, it means bright warning signals that this is a bad match. It could be a sign of future disagreements or unacceptable behaviors.
Hadia’s date was screaming red warning flags to a total stranger! He couldn’t understand how she was missing them or maybe to her it was acceptable. While the stranger decided how to intervene, Hadia began to make an exit strategy. They both couldn't believe what he had said or the negative thoughts he was sharing!
The Da Baby Situation
One of the glaring red flags to Hadia was her date’s opinion on the DaBaby situation. The young rapper found himself in hot water for two things after his August 3 show in Miami.
The first thing that made people angry was DaBaby brought out Tory Lanez to perform their single, ‘SKAT’. This wouldn’t normally be a big deal, but rapper Megan Thee Stallion had just performed on the same stage and had previous issues with Lanez. It was what he said to the audience that has continued to upset and divide the internet.
Hip-Hop Controversy
Fans were stunned as DaBaby launched a long rant with homophobic slurs and comments to the audience. It was completely unprompted and made the internet furious.
DaBaby attempted to apologize but ended up making the situation worse. His careless apology added more fuel to the fire and people were clearly either with him or against him. Hadia was opposed to anything homophobic, but the second red flag of her date was potentially worse.
Kevin Samuels: Guru Or Get Lost
The next red flag made Hadia questioned how her date viewed dating. He began to quote Kevin Samuels, a dating coach with extremely problematic and misogynistic content. Hadia didn’t even recognize the name at first and had to look him up.
It seemed the man she was having coffee with was completely different from the person she had been texting. Their views and values were too different and Hadia already recognized the romantic mismatch.
Finding Out Your True Value
Kevin Samuels is gaining traction because he coaches people on their outside appearance. He is a self-proclaimed professional image consultant and primarily targets black women with his criticism and “hard truths”.
Online he targets “modern black women” searching for a “high-value man”. Samuels focuses on being shallow and Hadia wanted a deeper, more meaningful connection. Anyone who only thought beauty was skin deep was not a match. Would she listen to her intuition or stick it out a little bit longer?
There Was No Immediate Threat
Hadia had stayed on her date because she didn’t think she was in any immediate danger. She didn’t think her date would verbally or physically harm her and looked at this different perspective as an opportunity.
Many women are conditioned to be polite instead of leaving dates and this backward thinking can find people in harmful environments they could have avoided. Just because there is no immediate threat doesn’t mean you should stay and encourage this dialogue. Were there other signs that Hadia missed and her mystery stranger saw?
Have You Noticed These Signals
There are a few common behaviors people may brush off or ignore that can be bigger warning signs! Watch out for someone who doesn’t let you speak in a conversation, constantly interrupts you, or uses possessive and jealous language.
Hadia was aware of a few but was trying to follow the standard dating do’s and don’ts. What would you have done in Hadia’s situation? What if that kind stranger hadn’t been at the next table over?
Dating Do’s & Don’ts
With the number of dates, people are going on you would think these easy dating standards would be followed. Everyone knows you should be on time for a date and show up looking clean and presentable.
Hadia had picked out the right outfit and was early for her coffee date. He date however broke the rules and offended her and strangers around them. In a public setting, it’s easy to forget that others could hear your conversation. Would you be uncomfortable if you had heard this from the table next to you?
Polite Boundaries For Everyone To Follow
It’s common for people to follow a set of boundaries or rules while they are getting to know someone. Especially on a first date, you are trying to make a good impression. Following these simple tips can make the experience more enjoyable for everyone.
Keep the conversation light and don’t focus on revealing too many personal details. You want to figure out if this person is trustworthy and if you should continue spending time with them. It was clear to Hadia and the stranger in this cafe, this date was over, but how could she leave without it being awkward?
Was It Time To Make A Dramatic Exit
The best thing to do when leaving date is to keep it simple. Don’t make an elaborate excuse and thank the other person for their time. Regardless if you’re going to see them again, it’s good to leave on a positive note.
Hadia decided when her date got back from the bathroom it was the best time to go. She began to pack her purse and thanked him again for meeting her. Would his reaction follow his rude behavior? Had the stranger left before Hadia needed backup?
The Stanger’s Reaction
Luckily for Hadia, her date was ready to go as well. He also said he had a great time and was confused when Hadia said she thought they weren’t a match. He asked if there was anything he could do to change her mind, but Hadia politely declined.
As she left the coffee shop she had forgotten about her earlier tweet with the stranger’s note and was excited to see her follower’s response. There was one more tricky thing to avoid with this disastrous date. Would Hadia pucker up or keep her lips sealed to get away?
A Goodbye Kiss?
It’s not expected on every first date to get a goodbye kiss. In fact, it should never be expected of anyone to do anything they are uncomfortable with. Leaving a date with a high five, hug, or no touch at all is totally understandable.
Hadia’s date had been so oblivious to her discomfort during their conversation she wondered if he would make an awkward kiss attempt. As she gracefully left the cafe, she felt good about her own behaviors and hoped her prince charming was out there waiting for her!
It Was A Toad Not A Prince
Unfortunately, the dating pool is full of toads instead of princes everywhere. Hadia counted her blessings that this date was over and began to swipe looking for her next potential match.
She got home and was excited to update her friends on an adventurous afternoon, but her jaw dropped as she opened her notifications. Was it possible that one simple note had made her a viral sensation?
A 33,00 Re-Tweet
After Hadia shared her stranger’s note, she posted it on Twitter and the response was fast. People wanted to know if Hadia was ok and also, what were these red flags? Since so many of Hadia’s friends followed her on Twitter, she also had several text messages asking her what had happened!
She began to laugh at the volume of responses, questions, and GIF reactions. She enjoyed her online supportive community and decided to roll up her sleeves and fill them all in. How much of her date would she share with inquiring minds?
Sharing Is Caring
The first thing Hadia had to do was give more context, and let everyone know she was ok! Many of her followers wanted to understand exactly what was happening to make a total stranger write this note.
Hadia reassured everyone she was not in danger and all the flags were verbal. Her followers begged for more details so she decided to share and get more opinions. What if Hadia had overreacted? Would her community stand with her views?
Storytime Is In Session
Hadia started by highlighting the date and then getting into the red flags. She said she didn’t want to reveal any personal details about her date but “that they didn’t see eye to eye on the DaBaby situation.”
It was hilarious too so many of her followers that she had to look up the infamous Kevin Samuels. That was enough proof for them and they were all relieved the date was done. Hadia’s guardian angel was sitting in the cafe and had leaped up to protect her. Did Hadia think her date had enjoyed her company?
Debate Or Educate
Hadia realized that she had different viewpoints than her date, but she told her followers this was a chance to educate. She said one reason she stayed was the chance of changing this man’s mind or making him see a different perspective.
The issues they had disagreed on are so important to Hadia it didn’t feel like a waste of time to listen to his views if it meant he would listen to hers. Discussion is so important because it can turn into a chance to educate someone who might be oblivious. What did the internet think about Hadia’s mysterious stranger?
Kindness Amongst Strangers
The one thing the internet could agree on was the stranger did the right thing. It’s so important to be kind and let someone know if they’re in danger regardless of the situation.
The internet applauded this stranger’s actions and hoped they could pay it forward if they ever saw someone in a similar position. What did this mean for Hadia’s romantic future? Would she keep looking for her Prince Charming?
Happily Ever After - Next Time
Even though this date wasn’t the happily ever after that Hadia wanted she wasn’t losing hope! She knew her perfect match was out there and let her followers know she was going to keep swiping!
Dating might be difficult but meeting your perfect match makes everything worthwhile. It’s going to be worth it when Hadia finally posts that happy selfie of her future mister right, and we can’t wait to see it!