Nightmare Dates That Made People Consider Staying Single

Blind Dates

The show ‘Love Is Blind’ has taught us all one thing: love certainly is not blind!

Sure, you might see a pretty face and fall madly in love with a person without even speaking to them, but the chances of them being a total mismatch are incredibly high. 

A few Redditors have shared some of their weirdest blind date stories.

These are proof that anything can happen on a blind date!

Not Mary

I was supposed to go on this blind date with a woman called Mary.

I showed up at the designated spot about 20 minutes early and waited.

For a while, no one showed up.

Then, a woman walked by about 15 minutes after she was supposed to be there. 

I was so excited, “Are you Mary?” I asked her.

“Are you [arichi]?” she turned and asked me.

“Yes, I am,” I said. She replied, “I’m not Mary.”

Story Credit: Reddit/arichi

His Mom

I went on a date with this guy, and he spoke about his mother the entire time.

By the end of our date, I knew all about her favorite foods, movies, where she went to college, how she made her spaghetti sauce, everything!

I got so fed up with it that I suggested he date his mom since no other woman could ever compare.

He looked at me, and I swear, he looked like he was contemplating it! 

I looked at him like he was psychotic, and then he started yelling at me, telling me that anyone who is half the woman his mother is should get down on their knees and praise God for their blessing.

Two years later, this guy married his dad’s high school sweetheart. I’m not even joking. 

Story Credit: Reddit/BrandyAlexander9

Six-Hour Drive

I was talking to this guy online, and he seemed nice, so I wanted to meet him in person.

We decided on a time and day, and I drove six hours to see him.

Once there, we watched a movie together, which was pretty boring and uneventful.

He didn’t talk much, but it all turned bad once we got back to his car.

As soon as I shut the door behind me, he told me to do inappropriate things with him.

The date was ruined. 

Story Credit: Reddit/surlygibberish

Interesting Conversation

I went on a date with this girl who I thought I’d really this, and this was how our conversation went:

Her: “What’s your favorite book?”

Me: “That’s a tough question, but when I was little I LOVED Jurassic Park.”

Her: “Yuck, Jurassic Park.”

Me: “The book or the movie? EVERYBODY loves Jurassic PARK!”

Her: “I don’t believe in dinosaurs.”

Me: “Fossils?!??!??!”

I was already put off by her responses, but what she said next blew my mind. 

Her: “I don’t want to get into it, but I think fossils are lame and made up.”

I ended the topic there.

But later on, she told me, “I don’t believe in outer space,” and my mind was blown. 

Story Credit: Reddit/Jack_Bandit

He Was Ill

I was feeling pretty ill, but I didn’t want to cancel.

We decided to meet at a Belgian bar, and she was one of the prettiest girls I’d ever seen.

She was fun, and she was totally into me.

At one point, I felt a gas pain, so I leaned forward slightly to quietly relieve the pressure.

That’s when I completely and explosively pooped myself.

You could smell it immediately. I quickly excused myself and went to the bathroom, but the damage was done. 

I left the bathroom, muddy-panted, left the bar, and took a train home.

The date was nothing compared to the horror of the following three weeks recovering from E-coli.

Story Credit: Reddit/jeremylee

Not His Type

I was in high school, and I had this friend try to set me up with one of his many female friends who didn’t have a date for homecoming.

His taste in women was very different from mine, but I decided to take a chance and meet this girl anyway.

I knew nothing about her until I met her the night of.

I found her completely unattractive, and she had a horrible personality. 

We went out, had dinner, and went to the dance, but the entire night was terrible, from my perspective.

I’m still friends with the guy that set us up, and we now have a mutual agreement that if one of us is setting up the other, we have at least to provide a picture and some basic description of personality.

Story Credit: Reddit/shinigami564

She Didn’t Know

I was set up on a blind date with my roommate’s girlfriend’s roommate. We made it a double date with my roommate and his girlfriend.

We went to the girls’ place and walked to a Mexican restaurant nearby. On our way there, my date’s ex drove by (they had just broken up after being together for years).

Her roommate told her that we were all just going out as friends and that it wasn’t a date at all. She spoke about her ex for the entire time that we were eating. 

Once I paid for her meal, she finally realized that this was, in fact, a date.

I thought she was crazy and that another crazy girl had just burned me, and I didn’t want that in my life.

Eight-and-a-half years later, our three-year-old daughter is playing with her toy trains in our living room.

Story Credit: Reddit/curien

The Perfect Girl

I was set up with a family friend’s daughter. I wasn’t that interested, but I was on a break from college, and she attended school relatively close to me, so this wasn’t like one of those lost-cause summer romance-type things.

They showed me what she looked like and told me some nice things about her. I picked her up from her parent’s place (we were both home for the summer), and I was quite surprised by how pretty she was.

I saw pictures from when she was in high school; they didn’t do her any justice. We went out for dinner and a movie. The dinner went perfectly, we had a lot in common, and I liked how down-to-earth and grounded she was. She was my type. So, as we were walking to the movie theater, I slipped my arm around her waist.

That was when she pushed me away and got all serious, “I’m sorry because you seem like a nice guy, but…I’m a lesbian. I just went out with you to make my parents happy.” It was tough sitting through The Chronicles of Narnia after that. 

Story Credit: Reddit/alexanderwales

Gamers

At the time, I had just opened up a LAN Center. For the last four months, I’d been working really hard every day to prepare for the opening. My friend set me up with one of his wife’s friends. I picked her up from her house and took her to a nice restaurant in town. It was hard, but I managed not to talk about work at all, despite it being such a big part of my life at the time. 

We talked about our interests and what we liked to do outside work. My work was all about games, so I decided not to mention that I played video games and ran a LAN center.

We then talked about our major dislikes and turnoffs, and she mentioned how much she hated gaming. She said that games were the devil and that anyone who sells them or enables children to play them is the problem with society.

I sat there listening with a dumb smile, and she thought this meant that I agreed with her. When she stopped ranting, she asked what I did for a living. I paused for a second, thinking about how I’d respond—but then I finally came up with the perfect answer: “I’m the devil, and I corrupt kids’ souls.” She freaked out and left. I don’t think she got the joke…

Story Credit: Reddit/Angryface

The Cherry On Top

I was set up by a friend when I was 16. He took me to the movies (at the mall) and awkwardly tried to make out. 

Then we sat in the food court, and he asked my honest opinion of him. I mumbled something typical like, “You seem nice.”

Without invitation, he then delved into what he thought of me, which was attractive but could be really hot if I lost 5-10 lbs.

Then he left me for a bit, which was weird, and returned with a lovely gift…a creepy puppet.

Story Credit: Reddit/RebeccaSays

TGI Forget About It

Two friends and I are hanging out one day when we get a call. It’s our mutual friend. He wants us to come to dinner with him and his girlfriend. They wanted to go to TGIFridays. We politely decline and tell him that we are all poor college students and TGIFridays isn’t very good. We invite them over and offer to cook (my buddy is actually a really good cook).

Thirty minutes later, we get called again. It’s not our friend, it’s his girlfriend. She wants to know why we aren’t coming to TGIFridays. We reply that it is expensive and that we’d much rather cook for her and her friends (we learned earlier that she was actually trying to set us up with three of her friends).

“But it will be better! You’ll enjoy yourself!” “I’m sorry, but we can’t really justify spending that much! We have food here, we’d love to meet your friends, but we don’t want to go to TGIFridays.” “Oh, come on,” (patronizing tone of course), “if it’s that big a deal, I’ll pay for you.” “That’s not necessary. There are three of us.”

She continued to whine and patronize us and finally put her whipped boyfriend (our mutual friend) back on the phone. He whines to us some more. We reluctantly agree to go as long as she lets him come out with us on Friday night. Fast forward a few hours, we get to TGIFridays. We meet our friend and his girlfriend and three girls from her church group.

We tried to be civil, but they were just so boring, very Christian, and incredibly snobby. We had no desire to be there. So, we broke out the emergency stash. All five flasks of it. Got incredibly drunk. America’s Funniest Home Videos was on the television. So much funnier when intoxicated.

We got really loud and migrated to the bar to watch a basketball game. My buddy ordered a slice of cake and managed to get none of it in his mouth and most of it on the floor/table. He then heard someone with a New York accent and went over to ask them for their driver’s license so he could compare it to his fake, as NY IDs are apparently really easy to fake.

The guy was cool about it, but we were still asked to leave. We tipped pretty well if that’s worth anything.

Story Credit: Reddit/epicviking

Real Men Get Lost

I have a story about a date that didn’t even get to happen. I got set up to meet somebody off the internet, who lived about an hour away. He was going to come into the city, and we would meet for lunch, go to the local Aviary, be all giggly and stuff, and hang out with some birds. Then (because I am a very emancipated woman) maybe come home for the unclothed fun times.

I didn’t know a whole lot about him at all, but I was willing to entertain the possibility, and it had been ages since I’d been on a date—working too hard, studying too much. The idea of a relaxing day was really pleasant. He was supposed to pick me up at noon. At 12:30, he calls and tells me he’s lost; he thinks he knows where I am, I should just hang tight.

What followed was SIX HOURS of getting a phone call every hour where I offered to come and find him, and he said nope! Nope. A real man doesn’t accept handouts like that! I made lunch, ate it. Watched a movie. Read a book. Spent a stupid amount of time on the phone listening to him curse at the city, the drivers in the city, the road signs in the city, and his car.

Finally, at nearly 7:00 pm he says, “I think I’ll stop at another gas station and get more directions,” and I just cut him off right there. “No. Sorry. No. Go home. This isn’t going to work. I’m ticked off and frustrated with you. Just go home.” “But aren’t you gonna give me a chance?” “Go home!” And then he called me the b-word and I hung up on him.

Went and played some video games. The end.

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

Up In Smoke

Picked up my blind date from a sober living house. We went to the park and ate some sandwiches she had made. 

She was so nervous that she smoked an entire pack of cigarettes (or what was left anyway).

Before taking her back home because she couldn’t relax, she had me stop at the store.

She came out with an entire carton. Then I took her home.

Story Credit: Reddit/Shadax

It’s Serial

I was only on one blind date a few years ago. It was with the investment banker son of one of my mother’s friends. One of her attempts at finding me a respectable boy from a good family. So that night, he called to ask if I could pick him up instead since his car had broken down. I thought, no problem, and asked where he lived.

The guy was staying at a buddy’s place an hour from my house, but still no problem, I thought. So, I get dressed in my cutest little black dress and heels to channel the grace of Audrey Hepburn, and gosh darn it, I think I did well. I pick the guy up, and he’s not all bad. He is a little on the short side but has a cute face and seems fit.

So, we got to the restaurant and ordered. He gets a few drinks into him, and we have a conversation about jobs/stuff/blah blah, but then it arrives at whom we admire. His answer chilled me to my core: Patrick Bateman from American Psycho, without the bludgeoning and stuff. He said he admired the character and aspired to live that kind of life (without the bludgeoning, of course).

DING DING DING…the alarm bells were going off in my head. So, trying to change the subject, I mentioned the frat he was in (we both went to the same university) and that I knew some of the guys. He then tells me that, yeah, all his friends were just vehicles for him to get ahead and that he didn’t like any of them. Okay.

Then comes the check. He forgot his wallet. So, I paid. Just awesome. By now, I was looking for this night to be done with, but no. Things had to get more fun. On the way back to the garage, we pass by an alley, and he leans in, whispers into my ear, and says, “You’re hot, and I want to screw you behind that pile of garbage,” He LICKS MY EAR!

WAaaaaaaah blashhldflka Do Not Want! I told him the night was over, gave him some money, and said he could take public transportation home. I then called my friends and went out to a bar to drink the experience away. I was jumpy for a few days, expecting an ax to come out from a corner at any moment.

Story Credit: Reddit/msfumanchu

Parallel Lives

3-4 months ago, I was talking to a girl on OkCupid. Things were going pretty well and we decided to get together. I was on a budget because I was saving to move out of the country, so I suggested a local Thai place which had $0.25 cent beers with an entrée, figuring the food was pretty decent and the cheap drinks wouldn’t hurt.

I offered to pick her up, but she declined, which is respectable. The night of the date, I’m running about five minutes late and feeling a bit rushed when I get a call from her. Even though I gave her an exact address in an easy-to-find place in town, she’s having trouble getting there. She ended up calling me back 6-7 times in the next 45 minutes as she tried to find her way there; no advice I could give was to help this girl.

By this point, I’ve already been there 30+ minutes and am about three-quarters of the way through my first drink. Red flags about how incompetent this girl must be are going crazy, but I’m already on the ride. The final time she calls me, she says, “Hey, is there a parking lot?” I reply, “No, it’s all street parking, but there were a lot of open spots when I parked.” She replies, “I don’t know how to parallel park.” Mind you - this is a city. Parallel parking is a way of life.

I’m pretty dumbfounded that she doesn’t possess this skill. This is already a nightmare in my mind, and as I sit there pondering how to solve it, she asks if I would mind coming out to park her car. I agree and start walking outside, a bit embarrassed at explaining that I’ll be back to the hostess.

I walk outside, and a few minutes later, she pulls up. First of all, this girl was less advertised. I got Myspace-angled hard. I’m not someone who needs the perfect girl, but I’m telling you this was out of control. I climb into the driver’s seat, and I first say how weird it is. I tell her I haven’t driven anything but a manual in three years, and her automatic feels very strange.

I slowly accelerate and head down the block. Part of the way down, I see an open spot. I let off the gas and instinctively go to push in the clutch. Instead, I stomped the brake. Hard. This girl had quite a lot of mass and wasn’t wearing a seatbelt. Any physics student knows what happened next. Her head flew forward and nailed the dashboard. I started apologizing like crazy, and luckily she wasn’t hurt. We spent the next hour having a really awkward dinner and then parted ways. No, we didn’t call each other.

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

Wino Forever

I met a girl online, and we talked maybe three times over a couple of weeks.

Then one night, out of the blue, she texts and asks if she should come over with a bottle of wine…I said sure since she seemed pretty cool. She turns up half an hour later with an open bottle she has half emptied already.

She finishes that off within 10 minutes, and I open another bottle, which is gone in another half an hour.

She passes out in my bed, waking up occasionally, trying to kiss me. She then pees in my bed and doesn’t wake up for three hours. I played PlayStation.

Story Credit: Reddit/instrum3nt

Don’t Call Me

I was set up with a friend of my roommate’s girlfriend. Let’s call the date “Lisa” and let’s call the roomie’s girlfriend “Karen.” I knew what she looked like, so I knew there was an attraction, but I had never spoken with her. We met outside of the restaurant, and Lisa was on her cell phone. I figured it must have been important, but as we walked in and waited for the table, she kept talking about stupid junk.

She was clearly on the phone with a BFF about nonsense. She gets off the phone, doesn’t apologize, and we get seated. About two minutes later, her phone rings again, and it is the same “OMG, no way!” garbage conversation. The waitress comes over, and we order drinks…while she is still on the phone, and I twiddle my thumbs.

The drinks come, Lisa is still on the phone….I’m half done with my drink and have waved the waitress off once already because Lisa is still on the phone. I’m not proud of what I did next…ok, I’m a little proud. Finally, about 20 minutes into the call, I quietly stand up, take $20 out of my wallet, and walk out without saying a word. As I’m walking out, I see Lisa’s eyes widen to the size of dinner plates, her mouth open wide, and her face turns red in embarrassment (all of the surrounding tables had seen what transpired and were whispering to themselves about it).

When I got home, my date Lisa was on the phone with Karen, who was over at our house. It didn’t occur to me until now that my date was probably on the phone with Karen the whole time! Karen was furious. As soon as I walked through the door, she started attacking me with, “You are such a jerk. Why would you leave her there and not say anything!”

I looked her right in the eyes and calmly replied, “I didn’t want to interrupt such an important phone call,” and then walked into my room and went to bed. As I was leaving the living room, I noticed the same expression on her face that Lisa had when I left the restaurant.

Story Credit: Reddit/stopdaspam

No Match

When I was young, probably around 12 or 13, an older friend asked me if I wanted to go to a shop with him.

I said I had no problems with it and happily went along. On the way there, he said he was meeting up with a girl and asked if I’d mind talking to her sister.

Her sister was severely handicapped and in a wheelchair.

Of course, I didn’t find this out until I met her. The girl then said she didn’t like me and insulted me.

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

Sloppy

Not my story, but a friend used to have a weekly get-together at his apartment on Fridays. One Friday, there was this round/plump goth girl whom my friend had met online.

He had apparently been exchanging messages with her and had invited her to the party to get to know her better.

However, whenever my friend turned his back, this girl would rub up against whatever guy was closest to her (most of the guys didn’t enjoy this, nor were they sure what to do).

Later in the night (after I had left), she made out with two party-goers. However, my friend later said they’d hooked up before the party began, so the joke was on them.

Story Credit: Reddit/patorjk—

Pulling a Possum

So, I was going to school in New Jersey. The school I attended had about a 15:1 guy-to-girl ratio, so you can imagine how much fun THOSE parties were. So, getting desperate for female attention, I turned my eyes to several online dating sites. After a few weeks, I set my sights on one girl I had talked to a few times. We decided to get together after quite a bit of flirting.

I should mention at this point that I was aware from the beginning that she had three (!) kids. I took caution to this but figured since I wasn’t long for New Jersey, I to take this as a sign that she was romantically active. I should also mention that the town I lived in was a trash hole that didn’t house a single attractive or moderately attractive woman within a 30-mile radius.

So, I drive about 30 minutes to this bar in her hometown the next Friday to meet her. I run into her almost immediately. I assess the situation. She’s got a cute face and a nice rack. She has a few extra pounds on her, but not to any point where I would call her fat. We have a few drinks while chilling, playing shuffleboard, and talking to her ex-lesbian lover (another story, maybe). We decided to leave the bar a few hours later.

She suggests returning to the apartment, which I assume is hers (more to come on that). Before we do, though, she grabs a 12-pack of Michelob Ultra (blah) from the bar’s cooler and tells me to walk, like this is a normal thing in this trash hole in Bloomington, New Jersey. We get to THE apartment and start drinking.

Conversation dies down pretty quickly, so I throw it out there because I am inebriated, “Wanna do it?” Not the classiest moment of my life, but it worked, so I’m not embarrassed about it. She takes me by the hand, and we go to the bedroom. She takes off her pants, I take off mine, and we start going at it. A few minutes in, we hear the front door open—and this is where the night took a disturbing turn.

Immediately, she tells me to stop and pretend I’m sleeping. I’m all, “What?” The door to the room opens, and the light turns on. All I can hear is, “OH, WHAT?!” I peek over my shoulder and see a girl and a very large guy standing in the doorway, looking shocked. The guy is freaking out, and the girl is trying to calm him down, telling him it’s okay.

I’m a goner. I know it. This is how my life is going to end. The only thing that saves me is when he takes the girl and throws her to the ground. This ticks her off more than I have ever seen another person get, and he immediately apologizes as they leave the room. I jump out of bed, throw my pants back on, and sprint out the door.

I later found out that it was her sister’s place/room, and she was living with her boyfriend. A boyfriend who very well could play linebacker for the Dallas Cowboys. Scariest moment of my life and the worst blind date experience.

Story Credit: Reddit/Alphie85

Kissing in 3D

Within the first hour, this super smooth guy said, “I’m sorry, I just really want to make out with you right now.”

Later, after I was all, “Um, I’d like to get to know you better first,” he took me to a 3D Imax movie about bugs. (Back when 3D was reserved for science!) 

The movie was cool, but then he leaned over to me with those glasses on…

He was trying to kiss me with those glasses on…

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

Just a Couple Drinks

Met a girl on the internet. I went to a local bar where she had happy hour with her coworkers. When I showed up, I realized that she must have started competition eating between the pictures taken and the time I met her.

A little awkward, but I didn’t really care too much, and her one coworker was hot (think Uma Thurman from Pulp Fiction), so I was down to chill.

We sit down, and my “date” starts slamming drinks. Within 45 minutes, she has become the bar's loudest and most belligerent person. Everyone is looking at us. After a bit, I politely excuse myself and say I’m going to head home. She starts yelling at me, calling me a wimp, etc. I’m like, “what is happening,” and walk out the front door.

She followed me, yelling…it was quite awesome. Then she sends me texts later telling me she went home with one of the guys at the bar and that I don’t know what I’m missing. It was awesome! I was laid off the OkCupid for a while after that.

Story Credit: Reddit/BillBrasky_

Videogames Are Expensive, Babe

Once went on a date with a guy from work (bad idea) who took me to Dave and Buster’s. During the meal, he said all of the following:

I have a short attention span and can’t date a single girl for over three months.

I want to become a professional video game player. I want to train to be a professional eater. I don’t want to work a day in my life. I want to play paintball.

He was 23 years old, and I was 20. Even I knew this was childish nonsense. Later on, he asked if I would pay for our tickets to the movie because he ran out of money on our $25 dinner at the arcade.

Story Credit: Reddit/daniellejuice

Aborting This Date

I went on a blind date two years ago with a guy one of my good friends set me up with. He had just started university at USC and was majoring in political science. I thought he sounded pretty smart from what my friend told me, and I agreed. We met at Laguna Beach and had dinner at The Greeter’s Restaurant, which is this cute little place that doesn’t have the best decor but has good food with large portions.

It was fine at first because he was cute, and we had some things in common, like music and traveling. It wasn’t until he mentioned that he did not support gay marriage and abortions, and IVF babies. I’m an IVF baby, and it’s a sore subject because my mom tried so hard to have a baby with my dad, and it wasn’t until she tried IVF that she had me.

Stupidly, I asked him what he had against IVF babies. He immediately spews on and on that IVF babies are nothing more than objects of status to their parents, that it violates the child’s rights, deprives them of their true relationship with their parents, and can hinder the maturing of personality, etc.

By this point, I was done with the date and just nodded to whatever he said. After he paid the check, he drove me home and walked me to the front door. I unlocked it and then turned around to say good night when he leaned in with his tongue already out. I didn’t know what to do, so I tilted my head so he would hit my cheek.

Worst feeling ever of a tongue licking your face. When I went inside, he looked at me, shocked, and asked if I would invite him in. When I told him no, he got ticked and said, “I paid for your freaking dinner!” By then, I just wanted to drink a bottle myself, so I took $10 out of my wallet, threw it in his face, and closed the door.

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

Well, That Stinks

I was chatting with this girl online, and she was fairly good-looking. She was a cute, petite blonde. She was maybe 23, and I was probably 24 or so. She even sent me sensual pics, alluded to spicy stuff, and seemed like she was up for whatever.

When we met, she looked just like her pic. I was happy to meet her, but there were some red flags: She started saying girlfriend-y stuff immediately. She mentioned Valentine’s day as if we were absolutely necessarily going to spend it together. BTW, she was a Ph.D. candidate in biology at a prestigious U.S. university.

She seemed to be a little promiscuous, mentioning that she did it with many of her lab partners. That was all fine with me. What wasn’t fine was her breath. She had acute halitosis. We returned to her place, where she started playing with handcuffs. However, I couldn’t get over her breath.

She was in just her panties, and I was probably half-dressed myself, and I started to realize that my member wasn’t going to get hard. I had to choose between telling her that I had a bad case of nerves or that her breath was unbearable. I gave her a line about not being over my ex and that it just didn’t feel right. She was offended, started to cry, and kicked me out.

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

Getting Unlucky

Well, it wasn’t really a “blind” date, as I had seen photos, but on my first date with someone, I met online, I reached into my pocket to pay for dinner and a strip of condoms fell out of my pocket.

It landed right there on the floor between us. And it wasn’t like it fell out of my wallet…it was obvious that I had hastily shoved the brand-new condoms in my pocket right before the date.

It was clearly as if I was expecting to get it on that date. I was pretty embarrassed and felt like a jerk for the rest of the night. I figured the cause was lost.

We ended up going out for like a year, though, and it was funny in retrospect. Not at the time, however.

Story Credit: Reddit/Iago78

The Ol’ Switcheroo

I had just come back home from college and was having a night drinking at the local watering hole when I noticed the place had a new bartender. New attractive bartender. Short hair, nice tattoos clearly leading to interesting places, and an Electric Six shirt. Oh. Yes. So, I start making a bit of conversation, and much to my surprise, we seem to really hit it off.

This wasn’t just a bartender-is-everyone’s-best-friend-until-they-leave hitting it off, but a really cool conversation. She starts hinting at if I’m seeing anyone, and I say no, and she immediately reaches into her pocket and starts writing something down. “On top is the number at the apartment, and these are directions. We’re having a party on Wednesday night, and you should come.”

True enough, a phone number and directions. What would you think? Wednesday comes, and I’m dressed up and ready to impress. I head over to her place, knock on the door, and there she is, looking amazing. She smiles and hugs me, grabs me by the hand, and drags me through the party until she gets to this big dude. “Jonas, this is my roommate, Jeff. Jeff, this is Jonas.”

I do the whole pleasantry thing, but when I turn around, she’s gone. I mean, wow. Gone. Like Batman. Not knowing anyone else, I keep on talking to Jeff. Seems like a good guy. Then it finally hit me. Suddenly he stops me mid-sentence and says, “You’re not gay, are you?” “No?” “You should really tell Liz that.” She had apparently set up the entire party as an excuse to hook me up with her roommate.

I had been on a blind date with a dude and didn’t even know.

Story Credit: Reddit/JonasVaughn

In the Pocket

Have you ever played billiards on a first date?

Imagine everything going great with the date…until she decides to flirt by sneaking up on you from behind while you’re taking a shot.

This is exactly what happened to me.

Before she flirts, you take the shot, and as you lean back, your head connects directly with her nose, breaking it. Yeah, good times.

Story Credit: Reddit/[Deleted]

I Think It Went Bad

I was waiting tables, and a former co-worker came in with her boyfriend. After catching up with her, she suggested I come out with her, her boyfriend, and her boyfriend’s brother because they agreed I was his type. I was 21, and he and they all were in their mid to late 20s. I had never gone on a blind date, but I like older guys, so I met them all at a dive bar.

I was getting along swimmingly with my date and even discovered that we had both lived in the same two northern cities before moving to the same southern city. Then they started ordering shots. I thought I was a heavy drinker, so I figured I could wow them with my amazing ability to keep up with their Patron shots. I was so, so wrong.

Later, I vaguely recall violently vomiting in the bathroom with the other girl while she looked in the mirror and talked about herself every so often, saying I’d be all right. The next morning, I woke up on their couch with a serious hangover. I was humiliated, so I bolted and took off in my car (my date had driven me back to their place, which was near the bar, in my car, and set me up on the couch, so that was pretty gentlemanly).

I drove in circles for about 40 minutes before I found my way out of the neighborhood and went home. Despite my terrible first impression, I hooked him pre-vomit because he still called me the next day to make sure I was okay and asked me out again.

Story Credit: Reddit/EtrontheMachine