Boyfriend Material
We know the feeling, you meet an incredible new guy, and you think nothing could be wrong with him. But look a little deeper. If he checks three or more things on this list, you should be careful going forward.
There are many subtle indicators that a guy may not be boyfriend material. Take a look at the biggest factors that can end relationships before they've even started.
"I"
When in conversation, does he talk about himself a lot? Note how much he uses the word "I" in casual conversation. If he brings himself up more frequently than you and he doesn't listen, well, then he's self-absorbed.
Now when he's talking about the relationship, he should use the word "we." It's a very important distinction from "I" in relationship terms. So make sure the guy you're talking to isn't only thinking of himself.
Not Likable
Guys can sometimes be amazingly independent, but they also need friends. Be careful where the distinction lies between being introverted and a loner. Always remember that there could be good reasons for him not having friends.
As hard as it is to believe, some people don't have anyone they can count on because they are the problem at the end of the day. Just be careful about not being likable by others.
Talkative
A guy should always be talkative. He needs to inquire about how you are and keep the conversation going. There should never be awkward pauses or nothing to say in a relationship.
Just don't ever feel like you're carrying the conversation even over messaging. He needs to put in some effort too. And a good boyfriend should never ever keep a girl in the dark when she wants to talk to him.
He Has A Past
Meeting new people is great, and we all have a history, right? The only thing is that it can become a problem when a potential boyfriend doesn't want to tell you anything about their past.
It's true that it could be just from trauma, and that's completely understandable. But be careful about a guy who hides his past for all of the wrong reasons. He could have a bad track history with women, after all.
Doesn't Pay Attention
Some guys will remember the big things like birthdays or anniversaries, but they forget about small things or don't even acknowledge them. If a guy doesn't seem to notice when you're upset or pay attention to your body language, then that's a bad sign.
If a guy is boyfriend material, he'll definitely pay attention to the little things that might be bothering you.
Having To Ask For Help
In this day and age, no woman should need to ask for help from a man for almost anything. Both genders are equal, but that doesn't mean that chivalry is dead, right? Sometimes a girl just wants to have her books carried to class.
If a guy doesn't offer to help with small things, then he isn't being very considerate. A girl shouldn't have to ask for her boyfriend to open the door for her or if he could help flip the bed. Sometimes it's nice for a guy to be happy to help without having to be asked.
Holding Back
Sometimes it's easy to see a guy is holding back rather than letting you in. It could be anything like having no interest in meeting your friends or not caring what they think, which means he doesn't want to mix his world with yours.
There are always subtle signs that a guy may be holding back, like not wanting to meet your parents or invite you to meet him. There normally isn't a good excuse and should be a red flag.
Disappears
He may bring you to a party that has no people that you know. To make matters worse, he decides to go off and socialize with his friends and leave you to your own devices for the evening.
Now a girl doesn't need to be monitored or controlled the entire evening, but it would be nice if she wasn't left on her own to fend for herself. She may not always be in the mood to try and socialize with random friends of friends.
Making His Own Plans
He might always be wrapped too tightly in his own world. He could always be making plans for the weekend with another group of friends. When you ask him why he's not making plans with you, he reassures you that he is.
He tells you that you're invited too, and while that can be a sweet gesture if he's not making plans with you and you're rather an afterthought, it could indicate he doesn't really care.
Not Romantic
Everyone deserves love, especially women. But when a guy doesn't seem super romantic, just make sure that it's just teasing instead of him being serious. There is such thing as too much romance, but basic romance is also the key to a healthy relationship.
Suppose he treats you more like a friend than a girlfriend. Just watch out. He might not think of you the same way you think of him.
Taken For Granting
Even though you might be very happy to be with him, it doesn't feel like he appreciates you very much. Sure, he says he does want to be with you, but at the same time, it kind of feels like he's taking you for granted.
A guy should really show a woman how much he appreciates her. He should go out of his way to show her that she's appreciated and loved.
Hasn't Got His Act Together
When looking for a relationship, a woman should preferably find a guy that has all of his things in order. But sometimes, it's not so easy to spot that. It could be subtle signs like not saving any money for the future or being a huge party animal.
If the guy isn't healthy in his own life, that means he certainly won't be healthy in your relationship, and he may end up putting you in a worse situation than when you started.
No Expectations Or Goals
Sometimes a guy can be fun-loving and live in the moment. However, this can be a sign of something very bad. Does he avoid defining what you two are or what he wants?
Be careful if he doesn't want to talk about the future and doesn't have any expectations of you. How else do you know he wants to grow a relationship? And if he has no goals for himself, how will he have any for you two?
Is Very Secretive
Everyone's entitled to their privacy. No one in a relationship should be overbearing and want to know everything about the other, even the private stuff. But at the end of the day, if a guy seems like he has something to hide, he probably isn't worth it.
So just make sure that his secretive nature isn't because of something sinister. It could end up hurting real bad in the long run. But also make sure he's entitled to a little space too.