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People Share Their Dark Family Secrets

5. Grandma Was a Bootlegger

My grandma didn’t drive. I thought she couldn’t, but it was just never discussed. One day, no one would take me to the store. Finally I said I’d just ask Grandma, and my cousin chimed in with, ‘Grandma can’t drive.’ But Grandma said, ‘Oh, you bet your sweet ass I can drive. They just don’t let me!’

“Years later, my mom explained that during Prohibition, Grandma bootlegged alcohol for moonshiners. She was so successful at it that when the moonshiners were finally busted, her license was suspended by the state. Later in life, she was told she could petition for it back, but it came with an admission of guilt or some such. She told ’em to go to hell.”


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