We all have memories of people with whom we have shared neighborhoods and living spaces. Some were fun, some were great and some were all round lovely. Others however were hmm for lack of a better word, flat-out idiotic.
These people from all walks of life share their Reddit stories and their experiences with idiot neighbors. After reading some of these stories, I think you will consider living in the jungle in solitude.
1. Deadly Neighbour
I was off sick one day, and my roommate came home for lunch and checked the mail. We got a letter with no return address sent to, "The Rooftop Pot Smokers," with our address on it.
As I open the taped envelope, a little bit of white powder is sprinkled onto my lap. My roommate and I looked at each other and we were like "Uhh! WTH!?" So I got up and took the letter outside to open it.
The letter was typed and said, "To the joker who likes smoking pot on the roof and yelling at people on the street, you'd better have good insurance, because the substance in this envelope is toxic. I'm ex-military, and have nothing better to do than to watch you get yourself to a hospital."
We were half laughing, half concerned, but I still called the cops. They took it very seriously. The street was closed off, and we were quarantined in our garage for almost 3 hours.
The tactical guys came back and said the substance was found to be non-toxic. Turns out the white powder was a ruddy pancake mix. My roommate and I, along with the cops and tactical guys burst out laughing together.
The police questioned the next-door neighbors to whom the letter was supposed to be sent and followed up with us a couple of times. Luckily they later moved out.
roogoogle
2. Crazy Kids
We have a grandma next door who is raising her 3 grandchildren. They are complete teenage idiots.
They got in trouble for stealing from our neighbors. The kids would offer to cut their grass and later ask to use their bathroom. Then they would steal medication from the bathroom.
It was extremely obvious who stole the medication. They pulled this scam up and down the block. Wasn't too hard to put it together.
Two of the grandkids are now in juvie. They stole a crazy expensive car from a very wealthy neighborhood nearby. And they crashed the car…
[deleted]
3. Book worms
Our neighbor home-schooled his kids and would always brag about how his children were geniuses with perfect scores on all the standardized tests. Sure, they all got a 1600/1600 on the SAT but he would never let them play with us unwashed masses.
Twenty years later, his kids are still living at home and all of 'em lack the social skills to make connections and get a job. Book smarts will only get you so far.
laterdude
4. Groundhog Day
I was out planting grass over some holes I had filled in, and I heard my neighbor yelling. He's an older guy, but big and threatening to look at.
Anyway, I look over and a groundhog is lumbering around his yard. He's yelling at the groundhog to go away, but it doesn't give a hoot and just keeps walking toward the garage.
The guy grabs his hose from the garage and gets ready to spray the groundhog, but it starts running toward his garage because the noises scare it and it can't hear where they came from.
I have never seen a grown man run like he did that day. He got inside his house faster than I would have thought possible.
I went over and scared the groundhog out of his garage, but never told my neighbor I did it. I think he hid in his house for a solid 3 hours.
Mattsoup
5. Dumb Thief
I ordered my PC components and I was sure I had put the correct address but they were delivered to my neighbor for some reason.
I asked if he could give me back my parcel because I had seen him taking the box inside but he decided to not give them to me because it added up to 2500 dollars. I proceeded to call the police and got my stuff back. He could have been a smart guy.
Sithis1415
6. Weird people
My upstairs neighbors ‘moo’ at each other. Very loudly. I used to live in the country and it sounds exactly like a cow, and me and my roommate have no idea why they do it.
Nobody believes us until they come over and hear it for themselves. We ‘moo’ back at them sometimes now if they get too loud and they usually stop for a while. They're just weird people though.
manofruber
7. Ring My Bell
Our neighbor REGULARLY forgets her keys and rings my doorbell to open the door (I live in a flat by the way).
It happens randomly throughout the day but it has happened at around 11 pm a couple of times as well. Despite multiple warnings, she keeps doing it. To be frank it drives me crazy and I can't wait till the day she moves.
ErB17
8. Mum’s chickens
My mom decided she wanted chickens, so one day she just got up and bought a pair. She saw on the internet that if you feed them, they'll stay on the property. A cage will not be necessary. (We live in the woods)
My Dad and I knew they weren't going to last long, but my mom was convinced they didn't need a hen house. Anyway, a day later, they got ripped to shreds by the neighbor's dog.
My mom went over there and asked that the neighbor pay for the chickens, and keep the dog off our lawn. He agreed, and things went back to normal.
It happened one more time, and she quickly snapped. She grabbed a bottle of antifreeze, stormed over there, and told him that she was going to start pouring antifreeze into a bowl, and that if his dog happened to be trespassing and drank it-she couldn't give less of a hoot.
Needless to say, the dog got an electric collar a few days later.
willworkforcats
9. Just one day
I have the dumbest of neighbors. They're Irish settled travelers and not good ones (if there’s such a thing as ‘good ones’). They rob and use their kids to rob also. It's like Oliver Twist. There are lots of them.
Last summer I cleaned 20 black sacks full of broken glass bottles from my garden due to the scruffy jerks. I had one of the lads climb over my fence and into my garden in a fit of rage while threatening to take my life.
Just last night, the same dude who threatened me was knocking on my back door looking to walk through my house because he had been chased home by the garda (police) and he was drunk, so he drove into his garden and jumped over the wall onto my property.
The garda was parked outside his house waiting for him, and he wanted me to wave him out my front door like he was in my house the whole time. I told him to eat bricks, and that it was 1 am so he should go away and he got annoyed again.
My family is kinda scared of confrontation and I'm reasonably peaceful but I know I'm gonna have to mess that dude up good and proper someday.
coreygodofall
10. Lifting Weights
I had a neighbor who decided that it would be an easy way to carry a broken dishwasher on his head to move it. The other neighbors watched him wondering how he was going to get it off of his head.
The answer turned out to be by dropping it on his foot and then cursing up a storm. To this day I question if he had thought this process through.
thegreatgazoo
11. New neighbour with barking dogs
A neighbor moves in. I go over to introduce myself and he is friendly. Then he introduces me to his 3 rottweilers. No biggie, I like dogs.
A couple of hours later I see him pounding in 3 huge metal stakes in his yard and he chains up the dogs. They proceed to bark from about 4 am up until 8 am. Within 3 days there was no grass on his lawn and it was just a muddy mess.
I nicely ask him to do something about the barking multiple times. He gives it the bare minimum effort, so I just kept calling it animal control.
Running out of options, I gave him $1000 towards putting up a privacy fence. He did, I sold my house immediately and moved. Heard a short while later he moved and took the fence with him!
habitualman
12. Big mistake
The neighbor had several banana trees at the corner of his lot. He thought he saw a snake crawling into the banana trees and decided to smoke it out and kill it.
Big mistake. Dry banana leaves burn like crazy. Whoosh! The whole section went up in intensely hot flames. By the time the fool had gotten a hose his pine hedge was on fire as well as the other neighbour's wooden fence.
This joker was saving the neighbor's fence whilst his pine hedge burnt all across his yard. Suffice it to say, that we couldn't tell whether the snake survived.
blackvine
13. Dylan and Mother
I first moved to the California coast and I couldn't find a place to live, so I bought a 5th wheel and lived in an RV park for about a year and met Dylan and Mother.
Today the 50-year-old man in plaid shorts and a Hawaiian shirt, my new neighbor in Morro Bay said, "I moved here not long ago with Mother. Do you also live with your mother?" He did not appear to be severely retarded which only means one thing, if I am murdered tomorrow, it was Dylan, my neighbor. He can be found next door, with Mother.
Dylan and Mother spent the better part of the evening yelling at each other over who clogged the toilet, with Dylan shouting at one point, "It smells like you did it, Mother!" This is why I can't have friends visit.
Every once in a while I look up at the moon and I think to myself, "Somewhere out there, the murder victims of Dylan and Mother are looking at the same moon with their cold dead eyes."
[deleted]
14. Steaming explosion
When I was a kid, a neighbor was attempting to deep-fry a turkey. The oil caught fire. He kicks a flaming, 400F, 5-gallon pot of oil directly into the pool. The pool erupts into a steaming explosion of hot oil and pool water. I would have loved to see what the bill was to clean that.
As a kid that was one of the best Thanksgiving moments, seeing the steaming explosion.
Tuggy_McTuggboat
15. The single plant
I think the funniest thing my neighbor did was grow weeds in their back garden. Now, I know that doesn't sound funny, and I'd like to say that, each to their own. If that's your thing, that's cool, but the way they went about it was comical.
They grew a single plant in a huge plant pot, which they would haul out of their house for several hours of the day so it could get sunlight or whatever. Eventually, the plant got pretty big and it was time for them to take it wherever they needed to.
So they hauled this huge pot plant out to the street and stuffed it into the back of a car. The car's suspension wasn't happy with that. The boot was also left open so the plant could stick out and not get crushed.
GavinRidley
16. Anger Issues
This idiot neighbor was a genius. Like PhD chemist, military ties, and some NASA awards. Also an alcoholic with PTSD. Brilliant, but good at making bad decisions.
He routinely removed ice from his wood porch with a very large blowtorch.
He once got angry at a bookshelf and shot it to pieces, leading to a SWAT standoff.
He restored a late '60s Harley, fell off the wagon before ever being able to drive it, and left it on a battery tender, in the sun, next to 2 propane gas tanks and a jug of gasoline. The fire department got there before the whole neighborhood exploded.
dtmfadvice
17. The kids next door
I was an idiot neighbor once. My and my buddy got ridiculously drunk and started kicking a hole in a wall in our flat.
We thought we had the whole floor to ourselves, but after we had created an enormous hole, we realized there was a couple in the other room cowering under a blanket in bed.
God only knows what they thought was happening. The landlord took his sweet time repairing it, which was slightly awkward.
Picklewing
18. Bye-bye Balloon
Someone down the road was too lazy to pop his balloons after a party, so he put like, half a litre of balloons in a 60-litre plastic bag.
And they have kids! It was flying through the street the next day and they didn't even bother trying to hold it down somehow for like, 2 or 3 hours till garbage collectors came by.
Lysergid42
19. No safe space to cycle
This is kinda a small story because thankfully my neighbors aren't crazy.
I was with my friend and my brother, and we were biking down our street. We were biking pretty fast (not very fast because we were young at the time), and the neighbor yelled at us to slow down. So we did and we said, "Okay."
So after that, he threatens to call the cops. We were so confused, lol.
Long-username
20. A good laugh
My neighbor was this grumpy, old Chinese guy who had no common sense whatsoever. Pretty sure he was going senile for the past few years or so.
Anyway, he used to have this huge maple tree that hung over his house several years ago. It was a bit of a hazard, since the tree was dead, and some of the branches could have blown off and easily hit his house.
So he decides to cut it down. He puts an extremely unstable ladder up against the branch when he goes to cut it down. Seeing that it's unstable, he decides to tie the ladder to the branch.
There's one problem, the tree trunk is to his right. The branch he's cutting is extending left towards him. The ladder was tied to this very branch Timberrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!! He survived the inevitable fall but gave seven-year-old me a good laugh.
downsouthcountry
21. Mischievous neighbor
Vincent, my mischievous neighbor, and I have always made it a challenge to scare each other when given the chance. On this particular day, our families wanted to have dinner together. Once the food was ready, my mom called me to grab a bottle of thick, black, hoisin sauce from the garage to eat some delicious Vietnamese spring rolls.
While I scavenged for the bottle, Vincent crept through the door while I was distracted and waited secretively. It seemed that his excitement couldn’t wait much longer because a wailing howl ambushed me from behind.
My primitive instincts surpassed rationality, so my first reaction was to chuck the bottle of sauce square in the back of Vincent’s fat head as he retreated into the living room. The bottle burst and splattered across nearly every square inch of the room.
After a few seconds of realization, we both were in utter shock and I immediately felt a sense of regret. He and I both knew the consequences if we didn’t get this cleaned up in time so we went to work. After using nearly hundreds of yards of paper towels and gallons of hydrogen peroxide, we finally got the mess cleaned up and ate dinner, but with less sauce.
IGLUU
22. Unruly Kids
We live next to a rental home. It's a two-story home with a full basement so families typically rent it. The rent is cheap enough that we've had several sketchy families but one family takes the cake.
They had hard living written all over their faces. I hate to use the term white trash but it fits. They had three boys, approximately ages from 4 to 8. They didn't take care of anything and we were regularly asking the kids to stop climbing on our fence, stop throwing things in our yard, etc.
One day, however, I heard metal banging on metal. Odd. The boys had taken a long metal pole (think flag pole) and propped it up on our fence (between the property lines). They were walking up and down it, causing our fence to bow. I go out to ask them to stop when I see that they are throwing BUTCHER KNIVES at the back fence while walking up the pole.
I managed to get the knives from them and threw them away. The parents never asked about them. They moved out last weekend - leaving their dead minivan for the landlord to deal with.
getaduck11
23. The neighbor's son
I live in a gentrified part of a city, close to a couple of big universities. The neighbor's son decided it would be a good idea to break into our house when we were asleep. He starts by cleaning out the electronics on the first floor gets bold and ventures upstairs to where the 3 bedrooms are.
Now, my door is unlocked so he opens it and grabs my phone and a bayonet I had on my nightstand. The next room is locked so he goes to the end of the hall, opens the door, grabs cash, a passport, and a phone, and wakes up my roommate. My roommate starts yelling, chases the guy down the stairs, and tackles him near the front door.
I hear the commotion and run downstairs to see my roommate covered in blood from being cut on the face and he's fighting with some dude I've never seen before. My roommate sees me and yells for me to grab my gun so I run back upstairs, grab my pistol, tell the guy to GET OFF, whilst he's continuing to try and stab my roommate, and I wait for a clear shot to release a bullet.
To make a long story short, he lived, and he's out of jail now. He doesn't visit his mom as often and walks with a cane because I nicked some nerves or something. A few months after his release, I got my gun back and nobody's broken in since.
blunt_toward_enemy
24. Snake bite
I grew up in Cyprus, and the Greeks love their hunting dogs. Now, there is one poisonous snake in Cyprus, and they have to teach the dogs to be scared of it.
The technique for this, according to my neighbor, was to use a dead snake as a whip, to beat the dogs to instill fear of the snake.
Now I'm not condoning this. I've no idea if it's even effective. All I know is, that this was the justification my neighbor gave me (14 years old at the time) of why he was whipping his dog, which I know he adored like a child, with a snake.
So, fast-forward to the night the dog is crying and whining. I can't sleep so I peek over the fence to check out the poor pupper.
His back legs were so swollen, it was clear something was wrong. So I knocked on my neighbor's door and woke him up. He rushed the dog to the vet. He had managed to poison his dog by beating the poor thing with a snake.
Dog survived. The neighbor was very grateful. But God, the guy was a moron.
Kinkzor
25. Night Gardening
One night, my family and I were sitting in the living room watching a movie. It was just after 10 pm. Suddenly, we hear what sounds like a lawn mower coming from outside.
We looked outside to see our neighbor mowing his lawn wearing one of those miner helmets with the headlight on it so he could see. Not 15 minutes later the cops showed up to let him know someone called in a noise complaint.
[deleted]
26. Angry Mother
I used to live in a condo building that had its share of interesting people. I lived on the penthouse floor next to Donna, who was one slice short of a loaf. She had this particular spot that only she could park in. If anyone parked in it, she would lose her mind.
However, Donna was better than the Russians who lived below us; they were hilarious. They had a son, and he had a car with his name as his license plate. One day, I was standing on the balcony, using my automatic starter, and the mother completely lost it. Screaming about how I was giving her cancer, and that I had to go outside to use my automatic starter. Like a full-on tantrum. I backed away slowly and guffawed.
I never told her about my wifi.
mcmoonery
27. Whose Baby Is It?
Two guys in their early 20s lived in the apartment below mine. They were friendly enough, and we'd gotten in the habit of small talk in passing. They had a little blonde who frequented the apartment, so I asked one of them if she was his girlfriend. He said, "No, she's been seeing (his roommate's name). She's pregnant." I told him to tell his roommate I said, "Congratulations," and went about my day.
So, nine months came and went, and the blonde had her baby....aaand....it was bi-racial. One of the roommates (NOT the one she was ‘dating’) was of Indian descent. She'd been with them both, though the white guy was somehow totally unaware of it.
Conversations were super awkward after that and I moved a couple of months later.
KelRen
28. Cheap Windows
I had locked myself out and my husband wouldn't be home from work for hours. A few weeks previously, I had discovered that the screen on the bedroom window could be pried off from the outside fairly easily and without damaging it.
The window screen wasn't secure at all. Closing the window too hard could knock it out. I knew that I had left the bedroom window unlocked as I usually kept it closed in the morning, then opened it later in the day as it warmed up.
So I get to prying. I bite my fingernails, so I didn't have any to use as a tool, and ended up making a bit of noise. As I get the screen off, and I am sliding the window open, a hand reaches out to grab onto my wrist.
I was at the wrong window. I was breaking into my neighbor's apartment.
Marisachan
29. Burning building
When I was a kid I used to live in a small apartment block and my neighbors wanted to do some traditional African cooking.
My dad walked outside our front door and noticed massive clouds of smoke coming out of their windows so he went to investigate.
Turns out they'd made a fire in the middle of their dining room table to try to cook their food and nearly burnt the whole building down.
[deleted]
30. DIY
I live in a condo, and my upstairs neighbor, who isn't a plumber, decided that he wanted to do some bathroom renovations. He didn't bother to figure out how to turn off the water and proceeded to try and remove his bathtub.
The pipes were old and he managed to smash one of the main pipes. Then, according to the fire dept, he released full city water pressure out of the broken pipe.
He didn't know what to do, so he ran to the building manager's door, who wasn't home, went back to his condo, and called the fire dept.
The fire dept came and turned off the building’s water, but it had been 30 minutes of full city pressure pouring out of his broken pipes. I came home to my condo destroyed. He also managed to destroy his condo and 3 others.
He is an engineer and figured he knew what he was doing.
[deleted]
31. Smoking Cigarettes
My friend and I, back about 5 or 6 years ago in high school, took a quick stroll out to my car to smoke up. Pretty small town - 800 - 1000 residents. We only had one house that someone occupied next to us, so it was normally pretty quiet.
My friend, who is with me asks why there's someone with a flashlight at said neighbor's house. I look over and see a guy with a utility belt and a cap on (dark so I can't see much). We're both at about a 7 on the high meter at this point, so we decide to lean back and finish off the smoke in my car.
As soon as we put it out, he hears a faint siren and says we should go inside. I look out and no longer see the guy walking around so I say sure. I step out of my car and see 10 or more cop/swat cars parking in my driveway and the other vacant driveways.
An officer tells me and my friend to get on the ground and not move. We assume it's what we’re smoking, so we freak out and start panicking. Turns out the neighbor was harboring a couple of fugitives and running an illegal narcotics lab in the basement. The officer tells us to stay in school and apologizes for the misunderstanding. Nearly crapped my pants that day.
DICK_IN_FAN
32. Aged to Perfection
My dad lives out in the woods and told me a couple of good stories about his old, drunken widower of a neighbor that we'll call ‘Phil’. One day Phil stopped by and asked my dad if he was any good at fixing drywall and roof repairs. Curious, my dad asked him why. Phil had drunk a bunch of scotch and fell asleep in his bed, only to be woken up by something hitting him in the face.
Startled, Phil grabbed a flashlight and his shotgun and started blasting holes in his ceiling. It turned out that a bat had somehow gotten into his room, and now he needed to fix the damage caused by the shotgun.
Another time, Phil stopped over to ask if my dad had a carpet shampooing machine. He had driven his snowblower through his house so he could clear the snow off of his deck and needed to get rid of the tire tracks. Again, scotch was involved.
cjhest1983
33. Irresponsible Dog Owner
On the south side of my house is about a 15-inch wide wall with a retainer, and directly on the other side is my neighbor’s driveway. My neighbor had a St.Bernard, which he never walked; instead, he'd just let him out the door to do his business.
His dog would hop up onto my side yard and take massive dumps. After finding and cleaning up a half dozen of these turd mountains, I'd had enough, and I am a master at passive aggression.
So yeah, I'd still clean up the poop, but I'd drop it onto the driveway trying to get it in just the right spot so my neighbor would drive over it with his car. After about 5 - 6 times of that happening, it stopped.
Plant_Mistress
34. Mind Your Business
Moved into a house about seven years ago. Nosy neighbors were up in our business as we renovated and landscaped. They were always trying to tell us what was ‘kosher’ for the neighborhood and what wasn't. They tried to lie about where our property lines were. They called the zoning inspector on literally every tree and bush we planted. That sort of thing.
I finally had enough and went to get a permit to build an eight-foot-tall fence running the entire length of their house. Only leaving about a foot and a half between their house and a now solid wall of pine.
Turns out, before we moved in, they used the lot between our house and theirs to store and move their boat between the front of the house and the back Oops. The best part is, if they'd just asked or weren't meddling in our business, it would have been fine.
Enjoy viewing nothing out of those huge windows now and forever, neighbor.
MarsupialMadness
35. An Unwanted Addition
My parents had just built a house. The way the street is set up they can only put a mailbox on the opposite side of the street. There's a family that has a house there, so my dad texted to see where he could place the mailbox. The Neighbor responds and says as long as it's north of his driveway it's all good.
So my dad puts a flag where he is going to have the mailbox built. The next day the mailbox (brick) is built, and the neighbor texts my dad, upset about its location. Later that week there was a county sheriff at my dad's door at 6 am. The guy called and reported the issue.
So my dad shows him the texts and the sheriff leaves. The guy had complained that the mailbox was an eyesore and was placed too close to his driveway, saying that he frequently has guests over that park there.
My parents have lived there for a year and have never seen anyone park there. Also, the mailbox is a standard, nice-looking, brick mailbox, and the only thing it blocks is the neighbor’s view of my parents' garage.
Dubya1886
36. Served by Karma
Had a neighbor dig a 6-foot trench in my front yard because he was convinced his sewer line went diagonally across my yard. It didn't. Heated debate later explaining what a utility easement was, and that we didn't have one. A call to the cops prevented him from digging at 9 pm that night.
He waited until I left for work the next morning and dug anyway. Left a new 6-foot hole in my front yard, and ripped up my sidewalk for me to repair. City said to take him to court. He continued, and dug in front of a 30-foot tall tree on his property, cutting up all the roots closest to my house.
In about a year, I had the branches of this tree that were hanging over my property trimmed; the rest fell over, due to wind, and landed on the neighbor’s property, damaging his vehicle.
Damage to his property was not covered, thanks to the multiple complaints I had made to the city, and which I supplied to his insurer when they stopped by my house to ask about the tree.
Cmb86480
37. Not A Great Shot
At my previous house, there was a time when I kept finding arrows in our driveway. Which is bizarre, but I had no idea where they were coming from. Then I found one IN the side of our house, right next to the window.
So I took a good look in my neighbor's front yard and sure enough, there was an archery target. I knew then that this fool was practicing with his bow and arrow, but MISSING the target.
I texted his wife and asked if maybe he could shoot towards the back of their property, ya know, where there are no houses or people. She took care of that.
Desert_Dogs
38. Domestic Dispute
A few years back, and many neighbors since….. there was a couple with three pregnant teenage daughters. The father and mother were always spatting, and the cops were constantly at their house.
Finally one day, the mom had enough. She tried to kick the husband out - and threw all of his stuff on the front lawn. When he returned home he was enraged, as he always is, and tried to enter the house. However, he soon found out that his wife had also had the locks changed.
Hearing police sirens in the distance, all the other neighbors, and myself, watched as he proceeded to get into his truck. We assumed he had given up and planned to drive away. Not quite. It was the opposite. Dude tried to drive his truck into the house, screaming that she couldn't kick him out of his own house.
Mind you, even though the truck was rather large and had a pretty high suspension, it was no match for the four-foot-high cement porch that was attached to the front of the house. The truck smashed into the house and got stuck on the porch.
The cops finally showed up but were unsure of how to handle the situation. Not only did he trash his brand-new truck, but he managed to somehow hit the porch at a right angle. So now not only was the truck stuck, but so was he, and seriously injured.
We waited for the firemen and emergency services to show up and remove him from the truck.
The family moved out a few days later.
[deleted]
39. Unnecessary conflict
I own about 8 acres. The house next to me has a right-of-way drive that goes through it. A couple bought the house about 10 years ago. One day they were down near the mailboxes planting some plants. I went down and very nicely told them that what they had done was fine but in the future, before they do anything on my property they need to ask me first.
He argued with me that they had rights to all of the property on 35' of each side of the right of way. I explained to him that this just wasn't true. They haven't spoken to me since and won't even return my wave when I wave at them. If they want to be mad at someone it is the agent who sold them the house, not me.
Lespaulstrat2
40. No Empathy
Sleep-deprived and with two babies, we finally bought our first house. It’s 2 am and loud - like moving the planet off its axis type-of-loud. The kind of loud where you’re worried that the house foundations might crumble.
Bleary-eyed, I go next door, and I am answered by a teenage boy. I explained our situation and asked if he would mind turning it down so we could get some sleep. Thankfully, he turns it down, but an hour later, starts it up again. The next night, the same thing happens.
This continues to happen on random nights for the next couple of months, probably on 10 occasions. Most of the time they just don't even bother to answer the door. My wife and I are becoming more and more sleep-deprived and more stressed.
The next time it happens, I go over there, and the father answers the door. "Great," I think. I explain from scratch the situation, hoping to get some kind of a result by finally speaking to an 'adult'. He listens, then says, with considerable largesse, "Yeeeah, about that, you'll get to know me over time. Sometimes you'll love me. Other times you'll hate me."
At this point I'm pretty dumbfounded - not the response I might have expected. Then he goes off on a rant about the local people, and how he sometimes sits in his backyard, in the dark, with a shotgun by his side, in case they enter his property. He seemed hopeful that one day they might..... We sold the house and moved.
[deleted]
41. Paranoia
My neighbor saw a coyote in his yard a year ago and every night since, when he goes out to walk his dog, he first positions his 4 cars to point outward from the fence in between his property and mine and turns on all the headlights to light up his yard. He then walks about 10 feet from his front door with his dog on a leash while carrying a baseball bat.
He does all this so his dog won't get eaten by the coyote that has been hiding in his bushes for a year and is eagerly awaiting the moment my neighbor turns his back to eat his dog.
Perhaps the best part of all this is that his dog is the size of a golden retriever (idk what it is, just its size), so there's little chance a coyote would even attack it. And yes, he also carries his bat around while walking his dog during the day.
Blakhawk12
42. Strange fertiliser
My neighbor is obsessed with his lawn. It looks like a dirt pile strewn with weeds, but for whatever reason he tries hard. Once, I caught him with a jug of his urine trying to fertilize it. But that's not even my best story from this guy.
One day, it's a balmy July in Minnesota. There is a smell. I walk outside, and other neighbors are standing on the porches, trying to figure out what smells. We all meet in the street, no less than 15 homes. "Someone's sewer is backed up!" We say. And we walk together as a mob looking for the problem, stopping at neighbor Jim's house, where the smell is strongest.
There he is, in all his glory- sprinkling meat compost on his lawn. MEAT. Rotting meat he saved in his hoarder home and is now strewing on his lawn in July. He's been saving it for weeks.
Avocadoavenger
43. How to Kill Weeds
The neighbor used a pressurized hand sprayer to spray gasoline on the weeds in his yard to kill them. We came home from work right after he was done, not knowing what he had done. Our house is a little lower than his, so the fumes drifted into our property.
We were overwhelmed by gas fumes immediately upon exiting the car. Our eyes were tearing and we were having problems breathing. My wife panics, calls the police, and tells them that there is a strong gas smell.
Police and fire departments show up in minutes with equipment to sample the air and determine its gasoline. The activity brings out all the neighbors, including the one who sprayed gasoline all over his yard. The police start asking questions and the guy goes into his garage, gets a bottle of Roundup weed killer, and tries to convince the cop that it's what he had sprayed.
The cop calls him out on it and he sheepishly admits he had sprayed gasoline. He tried to justify it by saying he does it all the time and no one ever complained before. As far as we know it hasn't happened again.
The best part is, that he likes to stand outside and smoke in the evening.
biodtl1
44. Broad Leaves
The man next door had a ‘gardener’. The gardener was over every day. I just figured they were good friends, maybe more. Didn't care. One day, I looked out over my kitchen sink window while doing the dishes, which looked over the 6 or 7-foot fence into the neighbor’s side yard. I noticed it was very bushy and things were overgrowing and quite obnoxious compared to the meticulously kept main portion of the backyard. I wrote it off and did my thing.
A few days later as I'm doing the dishes again, it hits me. This isn't obnoxious overgrowth, there is TONS of marijuana growing 5 feet from my home, only blocked by a crappy fence. I wasn't really into smoking at that point in my life, otherwise I could have had it made. I am sure he would have shared.
Eventually, it got so obvious that the other neighbor behind our homes caught on because I had the local undercover agents knocking on my door one day asking if they could go into my backyard. The back door neighbors would have been the only other ones able to see it.
Later that night we got to witness the police bust down the door and drag out over 20 good-sized plants. It was like watching a real-life version of Cops. They were in the home searching for hours. I'll admit it was pretty interesting to watch. Didn't hear about it in the local paper, and never saw the gardener again.
Jlegner
45. Tour de Swap
So one time, my girlfriend and I are living in our apartment downtown. And we got back from a bike ride, leaving our bikes outside locked to a tree, as it was easier than carrying them up three flights of stairs.
One day we noticed her front and back tires stolen. The funny part is that some older tires were laid next to her bike. It was as if someone wanted an upgrade and thought it would be ok if they left their old tires.
So I was looking around and noticed our bottom-floor neighbor had his bike outside with my girlfriend’s tires about to be installed on his bike. He wasn't around so I swapped them back and kept our bikes in our apartment from that moment on. The dumb guy thought it would be ok to swap his old tires for our new ones.
1800reposado