Legal Trap
They could get as angry as they wanted, but that wouldn't change anything.
He was standing his ground because he knew that someone had to teach all of these people a lesson, and he was going to. He knew his rights and he knew that his clever and devastating trap was 100% legal.
Retired Cop
It had been a year since David had left the LAPD. Retirement had crept out of nowhere and now it was time to enjoy other things in life.
He had found a new love of gardening and permaculture. It was also a chance to spend more time with his family. However, the extra free time made him notice something.
Not Welcome
It had been an annoyance at first. As much as David loved their gated community, it was still filled with a few, notable spoiled brats who drove their parent’s cars too fast as well as far too many entitled, rich couples that thought the world owed them.
He was also well aware of how the neighborhood viewed him.
Taking Advantage
Having a cop living around them made them think they had a “friend on the force” that could make on-demand calls to magically make their problems disappear.
Things like speeding tickets or DUIs. It took many firm “nos” and plenty of arguments before people took the hint. But things didn’t end there.
New Project
The pieces tumbled into place one day when David started on a new garden project.
He wanted to improve and shape the beautiful cypress trees that surrounded his property. However, when he inspected the outer corner, he realized he had a bigger problem than just trimming. It seems people were being purposely neglectful.
Damaged Trees
The public road turned in a fairly tight corner around his land. But for anyone who took it a bit slower (even the speed limit), it wouldn’t be an issue.
But there his treeline sat – broken and brown from daily car-contact from his neighbors. He sighed, shook his head, and called an old friend in road construction.
Road Blocks
David managed to get road barrels and fill them with water. It would be a better, clear barrier.
It was also within his property line and well within his rights. Anyone who complained could either like it or lump it. But, just a few days later, he would have to change his plans.
Fill 'Em Up
The temporary wall was already leaking and a few barrels empty. David grumbled and fumed. Fine. He would fill them with something stronger – cement.
It seemed to be the perfect solution until one of the speed-happy, spoiled brats ran into them head-on and destroyed them. That’s when the rich parents turned furious.
Proper Trap
They tried to blame him. But when they found out that they were in the wrong, they threw an adult-fit and decided to play dirty.
They called the community council and got the barrels removed because they were “ugly”. “Fine,” David thought. “You want to play that way?” It was time to set a trap.
Speeders Beware
David came back from the store with all the supplies needed – wood, metal, cement, dirt, and some flowers.
It would look amazing – completely up to community standards. But with more help from the friend in construction, he was going to play their game and win. It was going to be the most beautiful speed trap ever.
Built To Last
The end result was lovely. Even his wife adored it. The cement frame of the tiny garden was reinforced so even a tank wouldn’t break it.
This time, instead of leaving a few feet of “forgiveness” for cars, he went right to the edge of his property, leaving out a sharp corner for stupid drivers to catch and destroy their frames on.
Time To Pay
A couple of days later the expected crashing sound came. The yuppie neighbors’ BMW straddled the small flower bed. David went out with a satisfied smile and handed him a prepared manila envelope.
Inside were clear indicators of his property and any other legal documents. The small camera he had hidden over his trees would give all the proof he needed. Anyone who hit him would pay.
Money Talks
It wasn’t about the money, but he knew that cash was all these people understood. Either court dates would become another retirement hobby or people would finally take the hint.
He wasn’t there to be walked all over. It took a few more smashes, but things thankfully started to change.
Hint Taken
The events occurred less and less – with just the occasional idiot driver screaming about a massacred undercarriage.
A new warning sign was also put up for non-residence. David could finally garden outside in peace and play with his grandchildren without worry for their safety. As for the general attitude of the area?
Tentative Truce
It calmed down … somewhat. There were still snobs and brats that held a grudge. Once in a while, people still asked him for help with a speeding ticket.
But, now, when he said no, people didn’t argue. There was probably drama ahead, but now they knew not to mess with a retired cop who loved his garden.