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Hotel Horrors

24. He Was Looking For His Girlfriend

Night auditor. This big ol’ facepalm happened a couple of nights ago. A dude came down around 2 am, on his phone, pacing back and forth. I poked my head out of the office and asked him if I could help with anything. He said, “Naw, I’m just trying to find my girlfriend. We left the casino and agreed to meet back at the hotel, and she said she’d be in the lobby, but … ”

Both of us looked at the empty lobby. I said what I knew he was thinking out loud: “…Clearly, she’s not.” “Right,” He replied. I told him that I’d be around if he needed anything specific. The conversation continued, and eventually, I got to hear his side: “Babe?…No, Babe, I’m in the lobby, you’re not. Babe?…Babe. No, babe, I’m in the lobby…Okay, honey, I am literally standing where you paid the bill for our hotel room. Ya. I’m standing here, with the night clerk…Yup, I am staring at our car. So, where are you?…No? We can’t BOTH be in the lobby.”

At that point, I suggested to him that perhaps she was in our south building. He walked down then came back, still on the phone. “No, I don’t know where you are either…Nope…Ya know what? Just stay where you are, wherever you are. I’m going to find you…No, I’m not driving. Yes, I know, I know…Because I’m going to find you and get you back here before you wind up in China or something.”

The dude took off on foot and I guess he just started visiting hotels. He returned 45 minutes later. On the vestibule phone, he said he found her at The Sandman, a property about 10 minutes south of us. He led her, a very pretty blonde lady, towards the elevator. As they walked, he asked her, “So, does this look a bit more familiar?” “Yeah…” she replied, dreamily. “Ya know, I wondered why my room key wouldn’t work…”

…I’ll bet you did, lady. I’ll bet you did.


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