Lauren was growing up like a normal teenager and approaching her 16th birthday. However, unlike many of her peers, she was not going to have a big party and blowout with friends, food, music and dancing. In fact, her 16th birthday was going to be very different and very special courtesy of her grandfather. Lauren was in store for a very special present and gift from her relative, and it was going to be a life changing moment for her.
In fact, the gift was so special, it had been carefully planned and prepared at least 10 years earlier. So, when Lauren opened up her 16th birthday gift to see what was inside, one could argue that it would be a personal miracle for her, especially when she reflected on the value of her grandfather’s love for her in hindsight. Here’s how Lauren’s story came about.
Lauren was finishing out her 15th year and definitely working up some expectation what her 16th birthday was going to be. She grew up in a Texas family where everything happened big. That’s just natural for Texas, and the closer her birthday got, the bigger her hopes grew as well. However, oddly enough, Lauren was never the big party type. It wasn’t her style.
So, she decided to have something different for her 16th birthday that was a bit out of the norm for typical teenager. She wanted a personal event with only her closest friends and family nearby. It was going to be small, cozy, personal and with the folks she cared about the most. However, in addition to that wish, her grandfather was going add something special as well, something that had been in the works for a while without her knowing.
Lauren lived in Keller, Texas, a small-town suburb that became part of the much larger Dallas-Fort Worth regional area over time. With a population of about 45,000, Keller had enough physical separation that allowed it to give the appearance of being a small town in terms of feel, and that of course is what Keller advertised itself as regularly. Of course, everyone knew the truth that Dallas-Fort Worth was just down the road. Despite clearly being next door to the big city, Ren grew to be an education, solid character young lady with a lot of promise ahead of her.
Her parents regularly told each other how lucky they were to have her versus the stories they would sometimes hear about other teenagers, and what did they do right in life to deserve her as their daughter. Yes, her 16th birthday was going to be something special. And Lauren, or Ren for short, was going be totally surprised by it all once things unfolded.
Ren’s grandfather was patient man. When his granddaughter was about five of six years old, he got an idea in his head that made a whole lot of sense at the time, but it was going to take some doing and whole lot of time to mature and become ready. So, he got started, but he kept the whole idea of the gift a secret only he know.
Ren’s parents had no idea what was in the works, and they might have given away the surprise if they had. No, Ren’s grandfather was going to be patient and wait until everything was ready and the time was right.
It’s not uncommon for grandparents to give their grandchildren something special, a personal family treasure they themselves received from an elder decades before.
It’s a common way of passing down special heirlooms in the family. However, Lauren’s grandfather was going to beyond that idea.
Lauren always had a close connection with her grandfather. Her 16th birthday was going to create a new dynamic, but there was always a solid bridge between Ren and her grandfather going back to her earliest childhood memories. The bond started when Ren was a toddler, and her parents needed childcare while they worked.
Instead of putting the little girl in a daycare center, like so many other parents did with their kids, Ren’s parents decided if it was possible family taking care of her would be a far better option. As a result, and with her grandfather on board, Ren was cared for by her relative instead of a babysitter from the age of 2 until she was 5 and ready for kindergarten. And it was during this brief window, her grandfather, Ron Petrillo, came up with a great idea that would be an ideal gift for her years later. But it would take time, lots of time, and he had to work on it everyday with Ren without her knowing, without anyone knowing.
The time that Ron spent with his granddaughter was a very special blessing for him. And he wanted to make sure those days and hours were remembered long after. At the time, Lauren was just a toddler, so Ron’s gift was going to make it possible for her to experience the memories again when she was older and able to understand them much better.
And with her grandfather every day, there was plenty of opportunity. Ren was with her grandfather daily, so she became very close to him, as close as her parents even. Ron loved his granddaughter so much, he had the foresight to save his memories with her before they faded off into old mental memories and hazy glimpses of images in the mind.
For a while though, Ron wasn’t sure when he would give Lauren his gift. There were different days and opportunities, and he had to think about the potential for his own future to make the gift work. Obviously, he wanted to be around still to actually see the look on her face and her reaction, so he couldn’t get too far in the future and be unrealistic about life. So, he had to make a choice: either he would give her the gift at 16, at 21 or leave it for her as a sleeping surprise to find or receive after he passed away.
He decided the right time would be when Lauren showed she was ready. And that was going to be when Ren proved it by her own words and actions.
Day in and day out, Ron added to his gift without giving it away.
Even when the child grew aware of her surroundings and what people were doing, Ron kept his gift undercover. And, as the girl grew older and started her teenage years, Ron watched Lauren closely.
Patience is a virtue, as the saying goes. Ron needed a lot of it. He slowly and carefully added each step of the gift together with what he already had, and it depended on every day the grandfather had with his loved charge. At some point that opportunity to add more was going to end, and the day when Lauren would start kindergarten and move on would be the day when Ron’s gift completed its construction. And then the waiting period would begin.
It might be a decade, maybe even two. He wasn’t sure at the time when the waiting began. But each year that went by, Ron knew he was getting closer to that special day.
One part of the gift was Ron’s thoughts. Each day that he babysit his granddaughter, Ron wrote in a collecting similar to a diary what happened that day. Everything they did, every discovery Ren had as a child, every giggle she made, he talked about it in his personal writing.
And that took time, a lot of time, but it was worth it.
Most people get a few photographs of their childhood and glimpses of their most early years. They’re like snapshots, images without context.
Some have clarity, and others are just blurry. For Lauren, however, Ron was going to give her an amazing collection of vivid details from every day they spent together. It was an amazing gift very few people are given by anyone.
Ron wasn’t a fool. He knew time wasn’t going to work with him in the gift. When Lauren turned 16, he was going to be 72.
At the age of 21, Ron would be 77. A lot could happen between when he wrote his last page and when it was time to give his granddaughter her gift. Certainty was not on Ron’s side.
As the collection came together, Ron knew he had something special and worth far more to Ren than a first car.
The goal was to be a bit of a personal historian as well as a memory-keeper for his granddaughter. And doing so, he would give her the complete memories of their time together that she was too young to remember clearly herself.
Ron wanted to be sure was going to develop the right skills and character to treat people right, be a good-hearted person, and grow into an adult who would be good for the world instead of just herself. Fortunately for Ron, he was not going to have to wait for her to be over 21 or leave her the gift posthumously. Instead, Lauren proved she was going to be ready much earlier.
So, Ron decided to give his granddaughter her special gift at 16, and he would be around to see it as well, a double blessing.
Turning 16 is a big deal in American culture. Most typical gift teenagers hope to get when they turn 16 is a car. Even if it’s a hand-me-down, a car is huge. It represents freedom, status among other teenagers, transportation, and a coming of age.
The car represents the first step towards adulthood and leaving childhood behind. Lauren was not going to get a car from her grandfather. He had something else in mind. It was not typical, not common, and definitely not what a teenager would expect to get on 16th birthday. Instead, the gift, was going to be hugely personal and encompassing of every once of emotion Lauren would have, including that of her family too.
Some throw the 16th birthday significance as far back as medieval times, when it was the last major point of age that clearly defined a girl becoming a woman in her own right and an adult. The Catholic Church has carried this idea forward in ceremony over the centuries with the procedure of Confirmation.
We're spoiled today. We're able to film the equivalent of what would have taken multiple rolls of film and big portable camera all on a simple flat phone smaller then an envelope today. Ron didn't have that kind of luxury when he was trying to preserve his memories with Lauren. He only had what he could recall the same day, paper and a pen.
And he did his best. He hoped as his granddaughter grew closer and closer to her big birthday that his gift would live up to what he hoped for.
Ron had no idea how precious his gift would be. He had no idea once she discovered it, Lauren would want to protect and cherish her gift for years to come.
All he had was the basic tools in front of him to craft it day by day. He could be forgiven for having his doubts. As Ron saw less and less of his granddaughter as she grew older, he wondered repeatedly if his gift idea was such a good thing.
When Ron decided Lauren was going to be ready on her 16th birthday, it was all going to come together on March 2017. So, the big moment arrived, and Ron presented Lauren with his present for her. She unwrapped the gift and found in front of her… three spiral notebooks.
It wasn’t the keys to a car, it wasn’t a collection of savings bonds, just simply three paper notebooks held together with a basic spiral spine, the kind kids used in school with one per class. And each one had a title.
Lauren kept staring at the notebooks trying to figure out what was the gift significance about them. They were labeled Lauren book 1, and the same for 2 and the same 3. At first, Ron's granddaughter was entirely confused. What was the gift?
Was there something inside? What did it mean? Why?
Lauren was a bright kid, and she quickly realized she needed to open the books. She turned over the first cover and began to look at the first page.
As she looked at the first one, then the second, then the third, and then more, the realization of what she had became clear. Her granddaddy had given Ren the gift of her first years recorded every day that she spent with him. It took a moment for her brain to process it, and as she read the first sentences, Ron watched his granddaughter carefully.
He had waited this many years for the gift to be ready, he could wait a few more moments to see her true reaction. And then the emotions became obvious on Ren’s face. She read the words, "Hi Lauren..." Clarity hit like Mack truck and overwhelmed her senses.
Everything went quiet and all she saw was the words that meant everything about her past.
Every notebook was hand-written by Ren’s grandfather. Each page had a date, and the first one started as far back as February 13, 2003.
Ren was two at the time, but Ron recorded every little detail of every day they had. And in the book, Ron expressed his thoughts and concerns that Lauren would over time forget their special days together, so he set out to save them for her, so she could read them when she was older and remember it all again with a mature understanding.
It was only three years that Ron babysat Lauren before she was old enough to go to school.
But those three years were carefully remembered and saved in his notebooks with vivid detail and care. And it was precious for Lauren because, as we mentioned before, memories from one’s earliest years tend to be little blips in a haze, with a lot of detail lost in time.
As she read his notes all that haze cleared and every memory suddenly came back like a splash of cold water in the face.
The games they played, the special words and phrases they shared, the last days before she would no longer be with her grandfather all came back. The total work of love added up to more than 185 personally-written pages, each one with a story of Lauren’s life that day.
There was the "See Ya" game, and food goofs, and exploration, and the alligator (which was really an elevator, but alligator seemed like a better name for it).
The last page in the notebooks happened when Ren finally turned 5.
Kindergarten beckoned and her time with her grandfather was over. The last page in the last chapter was written.
As Lauren read through the notes and each day recorded, her eyes kept repeatedly flushing with tears. A Mt. Everest of emotions were running through her at stampede level speed and with no breaks of any kind.
Ron smiled and closed his eyes. The gift was perfect. He had done right.
When Ren turned 5 the story was over.
The pages stopped, the memories were no more, and the notes ended. It was the last chapter in a very carefully written book her grandfather had put together patiently and with dedication.
The notebooks captivated the new 16 year old.
And Ron watched in silence, cherishing the impact and the realization his granddaughter was experiencing. But every time she looked at another piece of the notebooks, it was like opening up a Pandora's Box; her mind kept flashing back to more hidden memories brought back to her consciousness.
Some of the pages hit home on what Lauren always loved in memories of her early days. The Zoo was one of them.
She loved seeing all the animals again and again. The noises, the smells, the colors and the differences all fascinated her young mind at the time. Her grandfather's notes captured every detail of every day they went together.
Those 185 plus pages her grandfather wrote significantly impacted Lauren for days and weeks afterwards.
She was so moved by what her grandfather had done for her, she showed everyone why he was right in the first place. She decided to share her story with the world to express how wonderful it was a thing that Ron did for his granddaughter.
So how do we know about this story? Was Lauren a personal friend or were we sitting there with her when the gift was opened? No and yes.
Lauren was so moved by the gift and what her grandfather did, she put the whole story on the Internet for everyone to read. And then she promised to do the same thing for her grandchildren when she got the chance to do so. No car, no savings bond, no tech gift can compare, when the bond between a grandparent and a grandchild is so strong, it’s far more valuable than anything physical.
Families are realizing involving the grandparents in the care of young children and todders involves more than just avoiding daycare costs. It allows the generations to bridge with critical, valuable bonds. Those connections only happen with lots of time to build precious memories.
Lauren and Ron proved that, and they also proved how powerful family bonds can be over time.